Padding out of the bathroom, I navigated the dark hall and living room.
I saw the big shadow sitting on one of the chairs at the table. In the faint light, I could see a glass resting on the table beside him.
“Cole?”
He didn’t move. “Go back to bed, Lili.”
“I was waiting for you, but I fell asleep.”
He didn’t say anything, but even across the room, I could feel…something throbbing off him. His dark mood seemed to fill the room.
I walked closer. “Is something wrong? Did he give you anything?” God, was Ava-Jane okay?
“He didn’t say a fucking thing.”
I stopped only a foot away from him. He was still in his jeans and Henley and sprawled in the chair. I couldn’t see his face, but I knew he was unhappy.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing I didn’t already know. I beat the guy. I hit him, over and over, but he didn’t talk.”
“Okay.”
Cole made a sound. “Don’t you get it?” He held up his hands. “I’m violent, dangerous. I hit people until they’re bloody. I’ve killed people. I don’t deserve to touch you. You should run, Lili, far and fast.”
There was enough light to see his knuckles. They were now more swollen and ripped up than earlier. My heart squeezed.
What would it take to convince this man I didn’t see him as dark or evil?
To convince him that I saw the shadowed parts of him, but they didn’t scare me.
I walked to the kitchen to get the first aid kit. I came back, set it on the table, then dragged another chair closer.
“Lili—”
“Shush. I don’t want to hear what you’ve got to say.” I opened the kit and then grabbed one of his hands. I felt the heat pumping off his body. I started cleaning his knuckles.
“I don’t deserve this,” he said, voice low.
“I know you think that.” I lowered my voice. “I’m so bad, Lili. I’m big, bad, and dangerous.” My voice went back to normal. “Well, I disagree.” I gently wiped away the blood and cleanedthe angry wounds. “Cole, bad men don’t sit around in the dark worrying that they’re bad.” I set his hand down, grabbed his other one, and started on that. I felt him watching me. When I was done, I set the stuff on the table, then I rose, and straddled him.
He groaned. “Lili…”
I lifted one of his hands, then started dropping kisses around the edges of his scrapes. I heard him draw in a sharp breath.
“What are you doing?”
I kept kissing his hand. “Kissing your boo boos better.”
His other hand curled around my hip and held on. “No one’s ever done that before.”
My heart squeezed. “Same.” I cupped his bearded cheeks and kissed him. He was still for a second. I licked at his mouth, tasting the peaty flavor of the whiskey and that darker taste that was all Cole. “I see you,” I whispered. “I see the scars, the ones on the outside and the ones on the inside. I know you’ve done things, you’ve beaten people up, killed people. But I see you. I know you’ve lost people, I know you have your own code. You’re a protector, Cole, and I love that you do whatever it takes.” I let my lips drift up to his ear. “I feel safer knowing you’ll stop at nothing to help me, to save Ava-Jane and the others, to keep me safe.”
With a low sound, his mouth closed over mine. I moaned, kissing him back, rocking against him. I felt his hard cock growing beneath me.
Then he rose. “Done fighting this. You want me, I’m yours.”
“Finally,” I whispered against his lips. “I need you, Cole.”
