“What fear?” His hand came to my face. “Inna.”
I looked down, still deciding how much of this he needed to hear. “Of leaving my children if I ever have them.” My gaze stayed on my lap. “I know I’m not my mother and I wouldn’t disappear the way she did. But what if she used to tell herself the same thing? What if I leave just when I have them and leave them to suffer alone?”
Dmitri hooked a finger under my chin and lifted my face to look at him. “You said you don’t want children, so we won’t have any. And I want you to know there will never be a reason for you to leave the people you love.” His thumb brushed against my cheek. “And I won’t force you to have children.”
I looked up at him. “It’s the only thing I can give you, though. You’ve given me everything. You brought my life back, you—”
“Do you know how much you mean to me? Having you is enough.”
I blinked. “Don’t you like kids?”
“I do,” he said. “But that doesn’t mean I’ll push you past what you’re comfortable with. This is a new life I’m starting with you.You come first. Whatever you decide is final.”
“Really?”
He pushed my hair back from my face. “We will make your wishes come true together.” He picked the list back up and scanned it. “We’re eliminating the therapist part. This one about Grandma,” he tilted the paper slightly. “You want everyone in the family there for her birthday? That would never happen.”
“Why not? I spoke to Alessia, and she said she’d talk to Rodion. Give me Roman’s number. I’m sure he’d agree.”
“I’m not giving you anything.” He lifted me off the table and set me back on my feet. “Roman is already in Russia. Now, can we go on our date?”
I followed him toward the door. “He moved to Russia?”
“Enough about Roman.”
“Well, we have a month to plan it. We could have the birthday in Russia.” I kept pace with him. “Think about it. It’s your home country. Grandma would love it for her eighty-fifth birthday. That’s a milestone, Dmitri. You don’t understand what that means.”
We stepped into the elevator without Dmitri saying anything else.
“You said whatever I decide, you’d do it. So that’s what I’m deciding,” I declared.
He exhaled and turned to face me. He looked at me as if he were watching himself lose an argument and resented every second. “God, you are good at this.” He paused, then relented. “Fine. I’ll arrange it.”
“That’s my husband.” I leaned into his side, found his hand, and held it. “So where are we going?”
“The casino.”
My smile faded. “That’s where our first date is going to be?”
“Where else do dates happen? Besides, you wanted to see one of my casinos.”
I laughed, shaking my head as the elevator opened. “Who exactly did I agree to marry?”
We took his motorcycle there. It was less than a five-minute ride. But I still felt a shift in atmosphere the moment we left the main road. I would have chosen a longer ride with him around the city for a first date. But it was also the first time Dmitri was showing me this side of his world. The mafia world.
Dmitri stopped the bike outside a restaurant, and I stayed seated for a moment, confused, my hands still resting lightly at his sides. I expected a club entrance, something loud and obvious. Instead, we were outside a polished, high-end restaurant that seemed to belong in a completely different conversation.
“We have a casino here, or did you lie to me?”
“Why?” He offered me his hand to get off, and I took it. “Isn’t the restaurant fancy enough?”
“I imagined a casino in a club. That’s the common setup.”
“I do have those.” He helped me take off the helmet. “This one is the safest. The club ones are chaotic. Anything can happen at any time, and I can’t risk anything with you around.”
That made me smile. I didn’t argue further as he led me towards the building. We took the back entrance, and I looked around as we moved through the corridor, taking in the low lighting and the staff who passed us without looking directly at either of us.
“So will I meet drug suppliers here?” I asked. “I probably won’t recognize them. Movies always show people betting everything, putting their property on the line. I want to see that.”
