At least I killed Bolverkr first.
When the guard’s hands drop, his eyes wide and a blade sticking out of his forehead, I stumble to the ground, wresting my wrists free. At first, I can’t wrap my mind around the change. It feels like I’ve died and landed in Hel’s realm of chaos. The guard drops to his knees and then falls forward—barely missing me as I shove myself away—the sword pushing up just a bit when its tip meets the hard rock below us.
Fhord’s standing behind him, his eyes flashing as his gaze finds me and then spins toward the man who held my wrists. He dies just as quickly, one of Fhord’s knives splitting his heart. I can only watch as he turns toward the remaining guard and they grapple for a few seconds. But that man’s no match for the ferocious dragon rider who came to save me. Before I can lift myself from the ground, he’s dead too.
And then Fhord’s turning toward me, his eyes haunted. “Why did you leave me, Sifa?” Fhord’s voice trembles as if he’d actually feared for me.
I stare at him for a moment, still too stunned to speak.
“Why the fuck did you leave me?”
Before I can move, Fhord’s in front of me, dropping to his knees to pull me to him. And our mouths collide.
Fhord’s kiss is frantic, desperate. His lips capture mine, his tongue stroking into my mouth to claim me. His hands are on my hips, holding me so tight it feels like he’ll never let go. An ache erupts in my center, spilling down to my core as every part of my body responds to him.
And gods help me, I kiss him back. My tongue joins with his, exploring his mouth as he takes mine, and my hands dig into his hair. Nothing has ever felt so right.
“You are so dangerous,” Fhord rasps as he drags his lips from mine. He watches me for a moment, his eyes dark and hungry, before he stands and strides away, turning his back to me. “We have to go,” he tells me, his voice tight.
“Fhord, I’m sorry. I thought I’d be okay.”
When he spins around, his eyes are full of torment. Desperate. He sighs, lifting a hand to run it through his hair, the other splayed out, holding tightly to his thigh.
“Nothing’s okay,” he says at last. “Nothing will ever be okay again.”
He turns and trudges into the cavern. I have no idea what to say to him—how to explain what I’ve done or why. So I push myself up and limp along behind him in silence.
Chapter seventeen
Fhord
I Can’t Do This
Ican’tdothis.
I don’t know why the fuck I ever thought I could.
I knew it when I felt Sifa’s conflict—her recognition ofsomeoneand need for revenge. When she turned and whispered her apology to me, I was pissed. But just for a moment. I can’t blame her. This place took something precious from her. I’d want to kill them all if I had the chance.
I let her chase her retribution, taking Thyra to the horses and hiding the guard before I went after my little rabbit. She’s strong and fast. I thought she’d be safe.
And then I felt her, barely breathing. My savage roared to life, desperate to protect our mate.
I was moments away from shifting—something I learned to control centuries ago—panic rippling through me. Because when I shift, the magic is like a gods-damned horn, blaring my location to the Dróttning, no matter how far away she is. And I’m not supposed to be anywhere near the Nest right now.
It’s been a long fucking time since I was so close to losing it.
My savage will always respond that way. If Sifa is in my life, the need to shelter her—to save her from any who would do her harm—will transcend everything. Maybe even my bond with Tindera.
I need to get the fuck away from her.
I need to keep my gods-damned priorities straight.
If I give in to myneedfor Sifa, Tindera and the Ætt will pay the price.
I almost wish we’d found someone else on our march back to the cavern, that I could have killed more of these guards. They’re fucking evil and the world would be better off without them. Maybe it would calm down my savage to take out some of the humans who caused Sifa so much pain. He’s thrashing within me, demanding sex or death. And sex is out of the question. I can never let myself get that close to my rabbit.
But we make it back without finding anyone else. She turns to me when we reach the cave, her eyes glistening with regret. Her hand reaches out to rest on my chest.
