I shouldn’t have trusted him.
Chapter twenty
Fhord
I'll Miss You
“Peoplearecomingthisway,” Sifa hisses at me. “Did you bring them here?”
My mind spins as I watch her eyes narrow in accusation, and then grow wide, the pain stark in their depths. Her back stiffens as she turns to look at Astarot. When she turns to me again, she droops, as if the air’s been sucked out of her.
She thinks I’ve betrayed her, just as she trusted me with her greatest secret. The secret that could get her killed.
She knows as well as I do they must have followed me. There’s no way they could have found us on their own, showing up minutes after I arrived. They must have seen me on my trip back, leading a saddled horse with no fucking rider. Like a gods-damned idiot. I was so wrapped up in my thoughts about Sifa, I didn’t even think about how that would look. I let my guard down and led them here.
Tindera’s going to kill me. If Sifa doesn’t kill me first. Or Astarot.
I need to get them the fuck out of this.
“Not on purpose,” I whisper, my hand reaching out as I watch her flinch away. “They must have tracked me.”
“You?” she demands, her voice low but strident. Accusing. “You’re a dragon rider, one of the Dróttning’s chosen. You know this land, what to expect of her soldiers, better than I ever could.” She pauses, her eyes flashing. “Youknowhow to avoid them but let them follow you here.” Now, Sifa sucks in a deep breath, her gaze flitting around the cave as she searches for … something. There’s only one escape, though.
“Let me get you out of this. They don’t know you’re here yet. I’ll take Hilde and lead them away and then you and Astarot can escape.” That’s our only option. It needs to work.
Sifa spins to look at Astarot. She shakes her head once, and again. Finally, she nods. Reluctantly.
“Astarot thinks we need to trust you. You’re right, we have no choice. This is your chance to prove you didn’t betray us. They’re half a viku north of here. Lead them away. And then stay away. We’ll find someplace to hide.” Turning, she starts to throw supplies into a bag.
“Look at me, rabbit.”
“Don’t call me that.” Her voice is angry, defensive.
“Look at me, Sifa.”
She stills for a moment, her hands hovering in front of her, before she lets out a deep sigh. Setting down the food she’d picked up, she wraps her arms around her stomach, inhales slowly, and turns toward me.
She’s everything I need, all I’ll ever want. My heart is cracking because I’ve broken hers. I need to make this right.
“I swear to you I didn’t do this on purpose,” I whisper, my heart in my words. “I would never hurt you intentionally. I care too much about you to do that.”
Her shoulders soften as her hands unwind from around her and find her thighs. “I believe you,” she whispers. “You feel this … thing … between us too. It doesn’t matter, though. Even if we can get away from here, this just proves we can’t be safe together. For both of our sakes, for our dragons’ sakes, we need to stay away from each other.”
She’s right, and it kills me. My savage is roaring at me because he knows he’s lost. She’ll never be ours.
“Give me at least a half hour to draw them away … or kill them,” I tell her as I grab Hilde’s reins and then stride toward Sigurd. “When you leave, head southeast, where the forest is deepest. You’ll find cover and food there. You should be safe until Astarot’s fully healed.” Mounting, I pause to hold her eyes one last time. “I’ll miss you, my little rabbit.”
The look she gives me is deep with grief. “I’ll miss you too, Fhord.” She pauses, the corners of her lips ticking up as she watches me. “Maybe I’m a fool,” she says after a moment, “but I have no regrets.”
I nod, struggling to stop myself from dropping from the saddle and taking one last kiss from her. Tasting her lips one more time. And then I turn and go. Because if I touch her again, my savage may not let me leave.
Turning to the west—to approach them from a different direction than the cave—I push Sigurd and Hilde to run as fast as they can. I need to get far enough away to convince them I came from that direction and then intercept them before they get to the cave. I don’t know if I’ll make it.
I’m circling back in the direction of Sifa and Astarot when I sense two guards. They’re riding slowly, as if they’re following a trail they keep losing. The trail I left, fucking idiot that I am. I get close enough for our paths to cross and then lift my hood and slow down, trying my best to make our meeting look accidental. I don’t want to be recognized, but I’ll use my dragon’s name if I must to get rid of them.
“What are you doing out here?” I demand in my most derisive tone when I catch sight of the guards. Spurring Sigurd forward, I plant myself in their path, forcing them to yank back on their horses’ reins.
“We come on the Dróttning’s business,” the closest man exclaims, his right hand moving to his sword hilt. “Step aside.”
