“Where I explain why I don’t sleep with a guy until we’re in an exclusive relationship. I don’t like sharing. Especially when it comes to the bedroom. It’s too dangerous.”
He would agree with that and had always been selective about his bed partners. “Then let’s have that talk now. And before you get started, I just want you to know that you’re the first woman I’ve slept with in nearly two years.”
She looked at him strangely, then asked, “Why haven’t you dated?”
Obviously, she equated sleeping with a woman to dating her. There was a time it hadn’t meant the same to him—especially during his late twenties and early thirties. Those were the times when he’d only engaged in one-night stands.
Matt could confess that since meeting Iris, he hadn’t desired anyone else, but he didn’t think now was the time to admit such a thing, so he said, “There are a lot of reasons I haven’t been dating. The main one is needing time to myself after finding out the identity of my father.”
“Time to yourself without female companionship?”
“Yes.” Of course, he would not have had a problem engaging in an affair with her if she hadn’t been involved with Warren Forsythe. “It was important for me to spend time with my triplet cousins and Chester to learn everything I could about Sid Roberts. I also spent a lot of time getting to know those Westmoreland men who always seemed to find a reason for a get-together to play poker, go fishing or spend a weekend at Stern Westmoreland’s hunting lodge or Cash Outlaw’s dude ranch. Last, but not least, were the court cases I had to prepare for.”
“Those are all good reasons,” she said.
“I happen to think so. However, what Idon’twant you to think is that my lack of sex over the past two years was the reason for my horniness last night.”
“It’s not?” she asked, pushing her finished plate aside.
“No, the reason I couldn’t get enough of you was because I desired you that much.”
He then pushed his plate aside, as well. “I don’t like sharing either, Iris, so I have no problem being in an exclusive relationship with you. And unlike the last guy you were with, who reneged on the agreement you made, I have no intention of cheating. I’m not a fool.”
Holding his gaze, she didn’t say anything for a moment. “I think I need to tell you what exclusivity with me doesn’t entail.”
“I’m listening.”
“Exclusivity for me doesn’t mean permanency. It’s over when either one of us decides it’s over. No questions asked.”
He continued to hold her gaze. “Could I assume that although it doesn’t mean permanency, it could perhaps lead to it, right?”
* * *
Iris broke eye contact with him. Neither Karlton nor Warren had asked her that. During “the talk” they had taken what she’d said as the gospel. At least she’d assumed they had.
“I dated Karlton for nearly eight months when he decided that since things were so good between us, we should get married.”
“What happened with that?”
“I ended things immediately. No discussion, compromises or consideration of his suggestion. He went back on our agreement.” Then, because she felt it should be said, she added, “And then, like I told you, although Warren agreed, he betrayed me. I’d prefer that he’d have ended things rather than cheat on me.”
“I promise not to cheat on you, Iris. And as far as wanting things to possibly become permanent one day, I can’t say I won’t want more, but if I do, I’ve been duly warned.”
She didn’t know what to say to that, so she said nothing. He stood, and she watched as he took both their plates to the sink, rinsed them off, and loaded them and the juice glasses into the dishwasher.
She stood, too, and began pacing. After a few minutes, she stopped and said, “There’s a reason I can’t do anything permanent with anyone, Matt.”
He looked over at her. “Can’t or won’t?”
“Either would be correct. I can’t and I won’t marry again.”
He didn’t say anything as he wiped off the breakfast bar countertop. Then he asked, “Is it because of the loss of your husband?”
“Yes.”
“Then you were blessed.”
She shrugged. “I probably should feel that way. Instead, I feel cheated. I thought we would grow old together, be a part of each other’s lives forever. But it didn’t happen that way. We were only married for ten months. Not even a year. That was cruel.”
