Chapter 16
Mike couldn’t help but smile as he walked into his empty apartment and turned on the lights. He’d confessed his hang up about his body to Aiden. It was only a first step, he wasn’t ready to totally bare himself yet. But taking that step and Aiden’s easy acceptance of the issue made him feel good—giving him the confidence that hewouldbe able to reveal his body one day.
He went in the bathroom and turned on the shower to warm up the water. When he undressed, his smile began to fade. Mike stood in front of the mirror over the sink, looking at his body. He was fit, he stayed in shape from years of habit and care for his physical well-being. But...he turned around and looked over his shoulder into the mirror. The back of his body wasn’t pretty.
Shiny burn-like scars marred his right shoulder, the top of his back, and down the rear side of his right arm. Along his torso, close to where Aiden had nearly touched him were more scars. They continued over his hip, down his ass, to the top of his thigh. And that wasn’t all. He pulled off his glove. His hand was so damaged that he preferred to wear a glove rather than deal with stares or invasive questions.
The heat of the shower steamed up the mirror. Mike swiped a hand over the glass to clear it off so he could torture himself by looking at his reflection a little longer.
Aiden wanted naked kisses. Of course he did, that’s what most people in relationships wanted. But he wasn’t most people. He was scarred and marked and unpleasant to look at when he was naked. He held up his right hand, staring at it. How could he touch someone as beautiful as Aiden with a hand this ugly?
Mike sighed and let the mirror fog over. As much as he wanted to feel a lover’s touch on his skin and to give touch in return, he wasn’t sure that he could open himself up to doing so out of fear that they would be repulsed by him. He hadn’t shared intimate touches with anyone in the two years since the attack. The lack of intimacy had him starved for physical affection. Kissing and caressing Aiden had taken the raw edge off that aching need for a lover’s touch, but still he craved more. Craved Aiden’s hands on his body. Mike braced both hands on the countertop. He longed for Aiden’s touch, but he was afraid that the very thing he desired would be what drove Aiden away.
∞ ∞ ∞
Aiden thought about Mike’s confession the entire drive home from the Playground. It stayed on his mind as he showered. It was still on his mind when he slipped naked between the sheets. That urge to caretake pushed at him to make sure Mike was okay. Revealing something that was obviously painful for him couldn’t have been easy. And to do it after a fight, in the harsh setting of a chilly parking lot must have made the telling even more unpleasant.
Even though Mike had said more than once that he was fine after sharing his story, Aiden didn’t like it. It felt wrong, and left him unsettled—as if he’d dommed a sub and then abandoned them without giving them aftercare. Aiden needed to call Mike and check on him.
Rolling over, Aiden grabbed his phone off the nightstand. He tapped it awake, thumbed to his newest speed dial contact, hit call, and waited for Mike to answer. The phone rang. Then continued to ring. Aiden sat up, worry already blooming in his chest. He knew that people weren’t obligated to take every call that came through their cells but after their talk he couldn’t help but be concerned that Mike wasn’t answering his phone. He was a second away from hopping out of bed to throw on clothes and go check on Mike when he finally answered, sounding slightly out of breath.
“Aiden?”
“Yeah, it’s me. Are you home?”
“Yes. I had to run from the shower to catch the phone.”
Relieved, Aiden settled back against the pillows. “Good. I was worried about you.”
“You called to check up on me?” Mike asked with surprise in his voice.
“Yeah. You have a problem with that?” The question was asked teasingly, but he really hoped Mike didn’t have an issue with being looked after.
“Not at all.”
That was a relief. And a positive sign that gave Aiden hope for something it was far too early to even consider. “You said you were fine. But is there anything else you want to tell me?”
“I am fine. There is more that’s bothering me. But I’m not ready to share it yet.”
“Okay. I can respect that. If you change your mind, just say the word and I’ll be ready to listen.”
“Thank you.”
“Now that I know you’re all right, there’s something else that I’ve been thinking about.”
“What’s that?”
“You called me Sir.”
There was a sharp intake of breath, followed by total silence for several long moments.
“I did,” Mike finally answered.
“Is that something you want to do more of?”
“I...”
Aiden remained silent, listening to the sound of Mike’s now calm breathing while he patiently waited.
