Patrice had come to stand beside me, her hand on the doorframe. She gripped it with a firmness that betrayed her silent worry.
Mr. Ashby took a deep breath, letting it out in a way that had me wondering if he was trying to calm himself. “They may be lost at sea,or they might make it back. No one can predict the ending. I tried…” He trailed off and I thought I detected an attempt to hold back tears. His voice sounded thick with emotion. “I tried to stop it. But they showed no remorse and continued to cry mutiny until the very end. The captain believes it was a mercy.”
Without regard to the impropriety of the action, I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and tried to soothe him. “You did the best you could. It will be all right.” His head dipped and I felt his breath on the nape of my neck. I held back a shiver at the sensation. It lasted only a few seconds, but the moment caused something to shift between us. He pulled back and our eyes met. I saw his pain. A new tenderness toward him began in my heart.
“Thank you, Miss Findlay. I…I didn’t know I needed that. I mean, to hear that.” He looked away for a beat. “Things will change from now on. With men missing, I will have to take on more duties. All hands on deck, as they say.” His smile didn’t quite reach his eyes, but his humor lightened the mood slightly. “I won’t have as much time to spend with you. Continue to use caution and keep your pistols nearby.”
What for, if I could not even utilize it when it mattered most?Instead of speaking about my regrets, I nodded. “I can take on more as well. Surely there is something we can do to help.”
“Aye, we can help,” Patrice agreed.
He nodded, then seemed to notice our lack of dress before looking away in embarrassment. “Well, there is nothing you can do until you’ve gotten ready.” He turned around fully. “I’ll leave you to it.”
My shawl had slipped from my shoulders, and I hastily pulled it up again to wrap around myself. “Of course. I’ll…be up presently.”
He paused, then added, “Mr. Tallow’s service will be this afternoon.”
Sadness washed over me again and I nodded quietly. Patrice closed the door, and we looked at each other with wary expressions. There were many things to say, most of which were of regret and despair, but I believed we both felt the need to focus on anything other than our loss of Tallow. As we made our way to our clothes, we spoke in low voices.
“With the men being left adrift like that, do you think the conflict is over?” I asked her.
“Aye, I wondered that myself. It should be, I think.”
“Perhaps it will continue to be an argument until we reach land…” Such a thing would surely divide a crew even further, as some would have agreed with the punishment and some wouldn’t. Guilt could make people do unexpected things. I would keep a keen eye on the crew’s mood. “At least we’re continuing on instead of turning back. I feared all these weeks would have been for naught.”
“Yer Graham could be on an entirely different island by the time we reached St. Kitts if we had to delay our trip that long.”
He could have already left,I thought with reluctance. It would be over three months from the time Mr. Ashby left by the time we arrived.
Once dressed, we went to the upper deck. The sun had just begun to rise, and I saw in the distance the boat shrinking into the horizon. I frowned, wondering how they would fare. Hopefully they’d been given some form of navigation. Even if they’d been the reason for Tallow’s death, I would not wish their predicament on anyone.
The remainder of the crew stood facing Captain Selton. Evidence of the skirmish from yesterday was everywhere. Bleeding lips, scratches, and torn clothes abounded. Scanning their expressions, I came to the conclusion that no one was happy about this development. Manywere frowning deeply at the man standing before them. He had been injured as well; his right eye was badly swollen.
I wondered whether those left behind on the ship had stayed because they feared being lost at sea, or out of respect for their captain? Perhaps they had respect for his title, but not for the man who’d lied to them about their wages.
His voice was slightly shaking, and I was sure everyone could tell he feared more backlash. “I thank you for continuing this voyage, men.” He dabbed at his eye with a handkerchief and winced. “I know it is not what you signed up for…but I believe we can have smooth sailing from now on.”
Captain Selton bowed his head. “I hope you all can forgive me in time. I swear to make it right once we reach land.” He lifted his head again, and I watched him grimace as he looked over the crew. “We will hold a service for Tallow after luncheon. I encourage everyone to attend. He deserves our respect.”
He cleared his throat again and lifted a hand to his first mate. “Hull will assign duties.” He turned his body slightly and called out, “Mr. Ewis, will you come see me?” before heading back to his cabin. It had been ransacked, from what I could tell from my vantage point. The door was hanging from its hinges and things were scattered over the deck.
Mr. Ewis followed the captain as Mr. Hull gathered the crew and began speaking of the needed replacements. I watched Mr. Ashby, seemingly calm and ready to accept his new duties. I took Patrice’s hand and we, too, joined the crew.
Mr. Hull raised his eyes to meet mine and Patrice’s. “What’re you doing here?”
“I can take on tasks,” I said loudly so as to be heard over the crashing waves and murmur of voices—the latter ceased when my voice carried. All eyes were on Patrice and me.
A few scoffs sounded, but they didn’t speak. I stared at Mr. Hull, hoping he’d take me seriously. His eyes were hard, his chapped lips pursed in thought. “Very well,” he finally said. “The women can each take a watch, and help Ashby navigate. I heard you were learning with Tallow as he did.” Mr. Ashby had never talked about learning navigation with Tallow in detail. I hadn’t realized he was so well trained that he would take over Tallow’s duties. Mr. Hull continued. “And I’ll also have Ashby teach you the ways of rat-control.” Then he pointed at Patrice. “You, red-haired lass, you can swab with Ridley.”
Patrice and I glanced at each other and then nodded once to Mr. Hull. Mr. Ashby caught my eye then, and I smiled at him. His slow smile in response had me wondering if he was irritated by my insistence in helping, or moved by it.
Mr. Hull now addressed the crew more officially after givingthe womenassignments. “We are now lacking a second mate, carpenter, two seamen, and a cabin boy. Ridley and Little must make up for Williams. Patch, I’ll need you for a second mate, and Miller, you’ll become the carpenter to fill in for Charlie Horton. Ashby, your job as purser can wait while you navigate and work on the lines.” Hull then waved a hand to dismiss everyone.
Once the crew dispersed, Mr. Ashby joined Patrice and me in the mess. We ate a small breakfast before heading up to learn a few of our tasks. Mr. Ashby was a patient teacher, as I had come to expect from him. He explained that a watch strolls fore and aft, port side and starboard, checking for land, other ships, or storms brewing along the horizon. It was an important duty of every member of the crew, and complete attention must be paid to it.
I looked up to the crow’s nest. “Won’t we have to climb up there to confirm sightings?”
He laughed lightly and shook his head. “I don’t think anyone expects you to do that. It takes an immense amount of strength to climb the shroud and remain steady against the wind. And when you’re up there, you’re more likely to become ill. Besides, your dress would get in the way.”
