But it was pretty fucking hard.
It took weeks to even be able to talk to Harper. She had no reason to, officially. They were not family, nor even friends, and Nadine certainly wasn’t on the legal team.
Everything went through Adrian.
“She’s refusing to put you on her visitation list,” he said. “She can’t say anything, not without them overhearing, but I don’t think she wants you tarnished by this.”
“And I agree,” Ruchi said. “I know you love her.” Her gaze was stern, knowing.Veryknowing. “But I don’t want you incriminating yourself. No—absolutely not. Do not say anything else right now. Tell me nothing, and let’s leave it atthat.But my official advice, Nadine, is that any association with Harper now could destroy you.”
“Fine! Raze me to the ground, just get me in that damn room.”
———
Nadine flew to London under the pretext of rubbing it in Harper’s face. Every night, a new club, a new party, a new headline. She restored her hair to its natural strawberry blond and left it down to bring out the green in her eyes. She let her sleeve slip, revealing a sun tattoo on her wrist. She began tucking flowers behind her ears, each carefully selected, every one front and center in every shot. She did a tell-all interview of her own withHollywordand filled it with snippets from the plays they’d performed together at CADS:love is blind, andwe’re all curious about what might hurt us.
If Harper wouldn’t see her, fine. But she’d tell her she loved her in every way she could. She’d signal it in every shot. And she’d be here. She’d be here no matter how many times Harper silently begged her not to be.
Opportunities came rolling in through Ruchi, and Nadine sifted through them all like she was compiling a battle strategy—which were worth her time and which might have greatest impact and, of course, which would help Harper.
The interview was a wonderful start—fortuitous timing, a clutch move but not necessarily the last.
So she phoned Ivan: “Are you sure?” he asked. “Have youreally truly considered what this would do to you? Yeah fair enough, you’ve certainly climbed out of darker holes.”
And Amos: “You know, I think I deserve a bonus, don’t you? Call it $100k, and I’m in. Wait … Nadine. Did you mean it? When you said you’d have given me the money anyway? Alright, okay. I’ll see you on Monday. Well, I’m hardly letting you style yourself for this am I? Not if it’s as important as you claim.”
And Caleb: “This person you’re seeing, would this … would it help? Yes, you know what I’m asking. Okay. Alright. No, don’t apologize—sounds complicated as hell. Good luck to you, Heywood. Whatever I can do to help.”
Nadine had, finally, figured out how to ask for help. So she went on and on. A gentle plea to Sasha Wallace. A barter with Kayla Alexander, promoting her brand of activewear in exchange for her assistance. Ruchi pulled strings, dug up a photo of Nadine at that car crash, theHollywood Whispererreporter thrusting a mic into her blood-covered face, and that would hardly be a good look, would it? So let’s call in that favor. Nadine exhumed ghosts like Lewis Stamper and Zoe Holland and Oisín Connellan, the kinds who might be enticed in for drip-fed fame.
By the time they got the call from the production studio—after allsomeonehad to fund this thing, even if it was through a dozen anonymous channels, and thatsomeonecould definitely point them in the right direction for interviewees—everyone was already on board.
———
And then, finally, Harper approved the visitation request.
Nadine tried to keep it quiet. For once, she did not want the press knowing. Even if they could have easily played it off, even if it would be just another brag in a long line of them.
She had to pass through security, depositing every item on her person into the beige trays.
“Do you want a closed visit?” they asked. “We can put her behind glass—we know she’s attacked you before.”
“No,” she said, not caring that it was too quick and too desperate. No, because she was here and Harper was close and nothing else mattered, not even her constricting heart whose beat seemed to falter with each step she took.
“Alright. You’ll remain in your assigned seat for the duration of your visit. Your hands must remain visible at all times,” the guard listed. “An officer will be present and listening during the course of your visit.”
Nadine nodded, and they escorted her to the small, dark room with its single table and chairs. And then the door opened and …
Harper looked like she was on a film set, that was all. Gray sweats, her hair a little greasy, her face bare.
She looked right at Nadine who was unsure how the officer remained, how he did not feel so inappropriately intrusive with the tension thrumming between them. Surely the whole world could feel it.
Nadine had to force herself to remain seated, her hands visible even as her nails dug into her palm.
“I assume you’re here to gloat,” Harper said.
Nadine’s eyes flicked to the guard. “Oh, there’s no point in that. This all goes beyond it, doesn’t it? And we were friends once.”
“Friends?” she asked, tilting her head to the side. “Sure, why not. I’ve lost a few too many of those to deny another.”
