“Needless to say,” she said calmly. “These aren’t the only copies I have.”
“How did you get these?”
She turned to me, and even though I’d leaned across her for the photos I was shocked to find her so close. Citrus and jasmine—a sharp, clean spike of her. “That’s for me to know,” she reached for my face, a patronizing pat on my cheek, and, belatedly, I slapped her arm away.
“Well, go ahead and get them published then,” I said, even as the words stuck in my throat. This could ruin me. My whole career was built on being so much better than everyone around me. And far too good for a thing like this.
I’d lose brand deals, roles would dry up, and any attempt at a comeback would be years down the line.
“Would you like me to do that?” she asked, smiling a little.
“I’m not giving you whatever reaction—”
“Because I might not, you know, if you ask me nicely.”
“Go fuck yourself.”
She laughed. “I don’t need to, Nadine. I have 1999’s World’s Sexiest Man to do that for me.” She plucked the photos from my hands and her voice lowered, scraped along the edges of me as she said: “I’m serious. Ask nicely and I might not publish these.”
I nearly refused her again, but something about her shifting tone gave me pause. Of course this was what she wanted. The public was a tool to her, not the endgame. All she cared about wasmeknowing she’d bested me.
My humiliation was a better prize than my ruination.
Still, it burned—but the thought of all that would unravel if those pictures came out hurt worse.
I met her eye, because looking away felt like an admittance of defeat, rather than a continuation of the challenge. “Please don’t publish those.”
“You can do better than that,” she teased. “On your knees, Nadine, just like I said you would be. Beg me not to publish them.”
I didn’t hesitate, only because I knew she’d savor every moment of my indecision and my final acquiescence. My knees hit the soft woolen rug, and I realized I did not know where it was from or how much it had cost, only that the designer I’d hired had supplied it and I’d never really looked at it twice.Thatwas the life I was on my knees for.
“Please, Harper,” I said, looking up at her even though I felt that would be worse this time, to see her smug face above me. I hated her, always, but especially in that moment, taking in her delicate beauty, the cut line of her jaw and plush lips protruding above, arched in a satisfied little smirk. Her eyes were positively piercing, and I felt the burn of it, of all of this, and forced myself not to run from it. I’d done too much of that—that’s why I was here on this floor. Where I determined never to be again. “I’m begging you. Please don’t publish those photos.”
Her smile grew, and she flicked her hand, telling me to get up. It was almost worse that she did not linger in it, likeit meant nothing to her. Iknewit didn’t, but god, she always knew exactly what would hurt me most and caught it by the jugular.
“I’ll think about it,” she said.
“Excuse me?” I demanded. This game of ours had rules—and keeping our word was at its forefront. After all, this sort of betrayal was only the kind of thing you could do once.
“I said Imightnot. Oh, don’t give me that look. You’re going to ruin everything. Screwing yourself over like this. You’ll get yourself kicked out of the A list or the drugs will suck your talent away or you’ll fucking die—then what am I supposed to do? I have a right to be angry about this. And I certainly have a right to make a few more requests before I let you off the hook.”
I had to grab one of the dining room chairs to keep from swinging at her. “What sort of requests?”
She shrugged. “Haven’t thought of them all yet. But I’ll be by sometime this week with the first. Don’t worry, you’re off to an awfully good start.”
A FATAL FEUD
Jasmine McKenna:So what we have is a situation where Nadine Heywood was turning to substance abuse to cope with the loss of her parents, and Harper Moore was falling in love with Joel Ingram. On their own, those situations might not have led to such an escalation in the rivalry, but combining Nadine’s lowest with Harper’s highest? It was an inevitable collision.
Amos DuPont:No one can compartmentalize like Nadine. Of course she scheduled her breakdown too.
Kayla Alexander:Harper was in love. It felt like, maybe finally, she was moving on from Nadine. I don’t even think she saw her all year.
Nadine Heywood:I hated her but she … she didn’t hate me in return.
In the hotel, Nadine’s eyes glisten. A single drop slides down her cheek, and she looks off-screen, shaking her head softly.
Nadine Heywood:Harper’s the reason I got clean. She came to my house. She’d found out what I’d been doing—I don’t know if she heard it from someone or she’d seen something but … I remember thinking,God, if even Harper is worried, something really must be wrong.She said some things were more important than our stupid rivalry and asked if I’d please consider rehab. When I refused she came back the next week and the next. She wouldn’t rest until I got help.
