It might not be required, but what was the right thing to do? What a dilemma. Did they find a will and turn it over to a murderer? That didn’t seem right either. This Christian walk wasn’t as black-and-white as Paradise had thought. Whatwasthe right thing to do? Didn’t justice matter? Maybe they needed to pray it was never found.
Blake let out a harsh breath. “I’m not sure I want to face what God might require if we find the will.”
“I get it,” Frank said. “It doesn’t feel like justice to reward a murderer for his crime.”
“If he reallyisa murderer. We don’t know if that’s true.”
“Mary seemed certain,” Paradise whispered. She was too new at this faith thing to know what was right. And it wasn’t her fight—they could figure it out and do what they thought best. But she still planned to pray nothing would happen, that the park would go on saving the wildlife with this new influx of cash.
If they lost the park, it might be years before Blake felt stable enough to start a new life with her. That shouldn’t matter to her, but it did, and she had begun to feel like in the list of things important to Blake, she was third or fourth place. Buthadn’t she encouraged him to take things slow, to get the park on firm footing? It had been a joint decision, but it was one she was beginning to regret. The day-to-day life of running back and forth from town and getting only snippets of time with Blake was wearing her down.
She gave a slight shake of her head. It was her fatigue talking from the brutal day and the stress of learning about the dire situation. She would never want to come between Blake and his family—they were all important to her too. It wasn’t a choice between her or them; it was all of them together. Her chronic feeling of being displaced and unloved was attacking now. And she wasn’t about to let those feelings win.
Blake rubbed gritty eyes, then made a mug of coffee in his Keurig and carried it down the stairs from his apartment. Dew dampened his feet as he crossed to the back deck of the house. He’d tossed and turned—and prayed—trying to figure out the best course of action. Sunrise over the park touched everything with a glow that smoothed out the rough edges. The view and the scent of pine combined with his mom’s narcissi growing along the side of the yard soothed his agitation. A bald eagle perched in the tall branches of an oak tree and watched for mice or other small rodents.
“I thought I’d find you out here.”
He turned at Paradise’s voice. Her hair was up in a ponytail, and shadows bloomed under her eyes. She hadn’t left until after midnight, and he doubted she’d slept much either. “Want some coffee? I can make you a mug.”
“Not yet. It doesn’t look like your mom and the boys are up,and I don’t want to wake them.” She crossed the cedar planks to his side and palmed his cheek as she kissed him.
Her soft touch and sweet breath were the balm he needed. He pulled her into his arms for a real kiss before he drew back, resting his forehead on hers. “Not sure what to do, babe.” The feel of her in his arms and her unmistakable scent were what he needed in this moment.
“I think we first need to see if there’s any truth to Mary’s belief that Dean killed Allen. Hez was going to try to get the accident report. Maybe he’ll get that today. In the meantime we can go see Mary and ask more about Dean and the situation. She might be able to give us the names of some of his friends. And if there’s an old girlfriend, she might be bitter enough to give us some information.”
“You’re incredible. Those are great ideas.” He reached for his phone. “I’ll text Hez. He’s an early riser.”
An answer to his reminder to Hez about the file came back almost immediately.Sent out request last night. I hope to hear later this morning. I’ll be in touch.
Blake thanked him and set his phone back on the arm of the deck chair. “I think we have a busy day today. Saturdays are always crazy. What’s on your plate?”
“Pawsome Pets is closed. I’ll check in with Warren and see if our animals are all healthy today. If there’s nothing that needs my attention, I could go collect any information Mary might have. Once you’re free, we can make the rounds to any friends or girlfriends she might suggest.”
“I’m not crazy about you doing it by yourself. What if Dean figures out we’re snooping around? You could be in danger.”
She stiffened and sighed before sliding off his lap. “I’m a grown woman, not a child. I don’t need to be coddled and protectedfrom all possibility of harm. You’re a natural-born protector, but you have to quit acting like the sky is falling if I’m out of your sight for five minutes.”
He stuffed down his anger before he could say something he regretted. “I know you are, babe. I think I react that way because the losses started early in life for me. They’ve trained me to always be expecting the next one. Losing you would be more than I could take.”
Her frown smoothed and a smile curved her lips. “I tend to overreact to things like that.”
How did other men do it? He wasn’t the only male who wanted to protect those he loved. Women could be hard to figure out sometimes. “I’ll work on it.”
Her gaze softened even more. “I love that you’re protective, Blake, but you have to learn the line between protection and smothering. I can make a perfectly normal visit with a friend to ask questions without alarm bells going off for you.”
She tapped his chest. “If we have kids, will you put a leash on them and make sure they’re safe every moment? Life isn’t safe. Things happen, bad things. We can’t control them, but we can temper how we react to them. Our kids will have to learn to deal with issues and discover for themselves that they’re strong enough to handle life. Don’t steal that strength from them or from me.”
He searched her gaze and nodded. “I see your point.”
The back door opened, and his mom joined them. “Good morning. You’re both up bright and early.” She looked as tired as the two of them. “I’m making coffee and breakfast.”
“I can help.” Paradise went toward the door. “I feel like biscuits and gravy. I’ll make the biscuits if you do the gravy. Mine usually turns out like wallpaper paste.”
Blake rose to follow them. “I doubt that. You’re a great cook, Paradise.”
She drilled him with an amused glance. “I can bake if it’s easy. Tricky recipes are still a trial, but I’m trying.”
“I’ll show you how I do it,” Mom said.
