I love that he thinks this massage is for him and not just an excuse to touch him.
His playful expression fades to seriousness. “Tell me something. How long ago should I have done this?”
Headlights from a passing car flash across the windshield, briefly illuminating his face, and I glimpse the sincerity in his expression. He’s interested in this answer.
“The night at your apartment was a turning point. But if I’m being honest, there was a lot going on before that. I was... sad when we stopped talking. I missed you.”
Considering how long it took to admit that to myself, I’m proud of how freely I tell him. His speech must have been a truth serum.
He glances at me, a surprised—and slightly cocky—grin on his face.
“That’s not supposed to make you happy. I was a miserable human. Stephen wanted to kill me. Besides, I could ask you the same question. What took you so long?”
His jaw drops. “Whattookme so long? Kate, tell me you’re kidding.”
“Do Ilooklike I’m kidding? You drove me half-crazy with wondering! I couldn’t figure you out!”
“I will crash this car. You’re thequeenof mixed signals. I was constantly testing the waters and you either slammed the door in my face or ran away. Every time I thought we were making headway you’d make some comment like,I could never be with a green-eyed, fiscally conservative giant. What was I supposed to think?”
He exits the highway and when we slow at a stoplight he turns to face me, frustration plain on his face. He’s really worked up about this. Over his shoulder I see the Capitol Building, looming and stately and vaguely threatening. It’s a reminder of everything at stake for us, and my stomach twists with unease. Have we really considered how complicated things are about to get? I swing my gaze back to Ben, shelving my misgivings for the moment.
“I can see how you’d be confused,” I concede, “but I was confused too. Maybe next time you should speak up instead of trying totestme.”
“Or maybeyoucould have just asked me if I was dating someone.”
“Uh, no.”
“No?”
“No. I do not chase guys. I don’t make the first move. That’syourjob.”
“Says the feminist!” He claps a hand to his forehead.
“You can still be a feminist and believe in the traditional rules of courtship, okay? I don’t need to lead in every aspect of my life. That’s the entire point of feminism, anyway, that I can do or be anything I want. And I want to be pursued.”
“You are a contradiction wrapped in an enigma, Kate Adams.” He shakes his head, muttering to himself. “‘Not a romantic. Wants to be chased.’I’ll show you a first move.”
“Is that a threat or a promise?”
The next time we stop, he looks over and he’s wearing his bedroom eyes again. Dark and dangerous. He leans over the center console and kisses me like he’s trying to tell me something, and while I’m not sure what the message is, I’m sure enjoying the delivery. We make out like teenagers until the blast of a car horn jolts us back to the present.
Finally, we’re at his building. We stumble to the elevator bank, latched onto each other like the world will end if we let go. He pins me to the wall, one hand cradling my face while the other snakes under mysweater, his fingers stroking up and down the bare skin of my back. It feels so good I’m practically purring. I bury my face in his neck, sucking in indulgent lungfuls of his addictive scent. I will buy cinnamon Altoids at my earliest possible convenience. I start laughing when I remember our earlier elevator ride, which now feels like it took place in another lifetime.
“I was about to kill that woman and her damn stroller.”
He draws back, eyes heavy-lidded. “You were giving me all these looks.”
“Me?You were givingmethe looks!”
We’re laughing as we fall into his apartment. We kick off our shoes like toddlers at a bounce house and come back together in a tangle of limbs. I’ve just started to wonder where we’ll wind up—couch? bed?—when he pulls back slightly and squeezes my hand. He looks unsure.
“I want you to know, I don’t have any expectations. Obviously. It’s not like I knew we’d end up here tonight.” He’s so earnest I could eat him.
“Noexpectations? Gosh, now I feel like a perv. I had all sorts of ideas...”
He smiles, but there’s an edge to it. “You know what I mean. I just want you to feel comfortable with... I mean, I’ll do whatever you...” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Jesus. This came out a lot smoother in my head.”
“I’m not sure I’ve seen you this nervous before. Heck, I’m not sure I’veeverseen you nervous.”
