“Angie, I may just take you up on that.” As I watch her perky little ass walk away, I realize I am laughing again freely. I am starting to feel a little like myself. Maybe I’m healing, maybe I’m moving on, or maybe I just needed a reminder that life isn’t only about Liz.
Chapter 36
Ben, December 18
“Ben are you bringing Angie to the holiday thing?” Kyle asks. We’re in the living room, I’m engrossed in a magazine so it takes me a second to process this question. Holiday thing must refer to the holiday party at work.
“Nope, broke up.” Angie and I dated only about a week, actually. Turns out she was into some really weird shit in the bedroom. That bad boy thing had ahold of her bad.
“You broke up with her right before the holidays?”
“Yeah. Better than waiting until after. This way I don’t have to spring for a gift.” Am I really that guy?
“Good point.” Kyle smiles. “Are you coming to the party then? I’m trying to figure out if I’m going.”
“Nope. I think I’ll be visiting Mum in Wales.”
“On purpose?”
“Absolutely.” What the hell am I going to do at a work Holiday party?
“I think I’ll go. That cute girl from marketing should be there,” Kyle says.
“What cute girl?”
“Marketing. C’mon, you’ve seen her. The brunette, Chrissy Banks.”
The name is like ice water poured over my head. Banks, seriously? The world is so damn small that I have a Banks woman in my marketing department?
“I don’t know, mate. You should hit that though.” It’s the best I can give him right now. “I have a call to make.” I bolt from the room.
Chapter 37
Liz, December 29
I’m completely unfocused on the grocery shopping I’m supposed to be doing right now. I have wandered aimlessly through the snack aisle and the soda aisle, and then I felt guilty so I wandered through the produce section and the natural food section. I really am just thinking about Matt and how I can fix this relationship. His Christmas present is still wrapped up sitting under my sad little tabletop tree. I literally have not seen him for three weeks; he’s been so busy at work. He keeps blaming it on the “busy season” but it’s been like that since I started dating him.
I sent him a text message this morning, but that was hours ago and he has yet to answer me. Since I finished with work today I’ve probably checked my phone 12 times. Now I’m killing time by wandering through the grocery store. I throw a bag of candy in the cart and move to the next aisle. Check my phone again. Nothing.
For a fleeting second, I think about Ben. I imagine how easy it was to be around him, how I could just be myself without feeling like I had to perform or fix everything. That thought makes me tighten my grip on the cart handle, almost like a small pang of guilt, but I push it aside. This is Matt’s life, his chaos, his world. I have to fix it.
Feminine hygiene products. Do I need these? Let’s see, I’m pretty regular usually. I remember we went to his office party for Halloween and I had just finished with my “friend” then. So I should’ve had another visit at the end of the month, which would mean another one is coming soon and I would need more products. But that’s strange, I can’t remember having a cycle in November. Huh, weird.
I grab my phone and whip open the calendar. I’m pretty good about remembering to mark the calendar with a little “p” when I start my monthly cycle so I can track that. There it is, October 23 marked with a little “p.” No markings in November. Shit, that can’t be right. I check again. Nope, no markings in November. Shit.
I spin around and grab a box of 3 pregnancy tests off the shelf behind me, praying that just this once I simply forgot to mark the calendar. Shit.
Chapter 38
Ben, January 5
“Let’s go to the pub.” Zach is bellowing at me from the bottom of our narrow staircase.
I’m standing in the kitchen with the fridge open and we have bugger all in there. “You know, someone once told me I’ll never meet the perfect girl at a bloody pub,” I yell back.
“What the fuck did that person know?” he bellows.
What, indeed?
