“I know, Raithe. But...” I lowered my arm, which trembled slightly. “Every time I close my eyes, I see Vahn,” I whispered. “I see myself killing him. Or I see him sacrificing me to the Deathless King. Or I see myself plunging a knife into your heart, because Vahn is in control and I can’t stop myself. And now...” My eyes squeezed shut. “Now I see him as a rotting abomination, telling me that it’s my fault that he’s like this. I know that’s what I’m going to face when I go to sleep tonight. Either thator I’ll watch the jair’oa city being buried under a mountain of sand pouring in from overhead. And I’ll see everyone there die, because they met the Fateless by some random chance, and all their stories changed for the worse.”
I drew in a ragged breath, remembering the abomination that was Vahn slithering over the glass dome, his sightless white eye peering down at us. I heard the frightened squeaks and scampers of the jair’oa as they fled around me and, in my mind, I saw the glass shatter, spilling death and destruction into the heart of the city.
“I might’ve killed an entire colony of adorable sentient rodents,” I muttered, the sarcasm bitter in my throat. “I don’t think I can deal with seeing that, tonight.”
Raithe reached out and gathered me, blankets and all, into his arms. He drew me close, and I leaned into his warmth. “Stay with me, then,” he murmured in my ear. “Keep me company tonight. Maybe I’ll be able to keep the nightmares away for a little while.”
I relaxed against him, closing my eyes. His heartbeat pulsed in my ears, his presence a barrier against every horror crowding against my mind, clawing at me with bony hands. “I’m scared, Raithe,” I finally confessed in a whisper. “Not of Vahn, or of dying, or even the Deathless King.” I swallowed the lie on my tongue. “Okay, so I’m a little afraid of the Deathless King. But I can’t get what Vahn told me out of my head—that everyone I touch is in danger of having their fate unraveled. The jair’oa saw me, they brought me to their city because they thought I was some sort of sign from their creator god, and I led Vahn right tothem. The Scarab Clan tried to help me, and half the tribe got wiped out when Vahn’s undead army attacked.” I clenched a fist in his shirt. “I can’t stop it. I am an agent of chaos, just like he said.”
“Or...” Raithe stroked my back. “Those things all happened because the Deathless King has been trying to kill you,” he murmured. “Because he knows how important the Fateless is. You are the only one who can see Maederyss’s loom. You are the only one not bound in the prophecy that says a Deathless will slay the goddess of Fate and enslave every soul in the Weave.” He gently touched my chin, bringing my attention to him. “What happened with the Scarab Clan and the jair’oa is not on your head, Sparrow. The Fateless is an agent ofchange, not chaos. And the world has to change now. Otherwise, we won’t have much of a world to exist in.”
I shivered at the look in his eyes and dropped my gaze. “You’re right,” I said. “The world does need to change. I just wish that the fates I unravel would change for the better. Not get infinitely worse.”
“They have.” His fingers brushed my cheek and slid into my hair, leaving the softest tingles against my skin. “I can think of a few.”
I thought of the jair’oa, the Scarab Clan, the crew aboard the strider, all the people I knew in Kovass. Everyone whose lives had been turned upside down because they crossed paths with the Fateless. “Whose?”
“Mine.”
My heart skipped a beat. Did he know? I looked up andfound him smiling down at me; that gentle smile that made my stomach turn wild cartwheels. “If I’d never met you in Kovass that night,” he murmured, framing my face with his hand, “I don’t know what would’ve happened, but...” He leaned closer, his eyes and voice very soft. “This is exactly where I want to be. By your side, even if that means facing Deathless Kings, abominations, or an entire kingdom of statues that want to kill us. I don’t care if you’ve changed my fate or unraveled my story—you are my world now. My thread, my destiny, whatever you want to call it, is yours.”
He kissed me, and I wrapped my arms around his neck, letting the blankets fall to the sand. The wind ruffled my clothes and tugged at my hair, but I didn’t feel the cold. I didn’t feel anything but Raithe; his arms, his lips, the steady thud of his heart against mine. It still felt surreal, like it was happening to someone else.
We drew back, Raithe still smiling down at me. “There,” he murmured, stroking my cheek with his thumb. “Do you think I’ve chased the nightmares away tonight?”
My heart was still pounding, my insides dancing wildly within. I gazed into his beautiful eyes, the pale blue irises ringed by silver, and my longing for him rose up and suffocated everything else.
Gathering my courage, I slipped my hands around the back of his head and laced my fingers together, trapping him against me. “I think it’s too soon to tell,” I whispered, as his brows arched. “I think we need to test the theory a little more.”
“Oh?” He sounded slightly breathless, the desire in his gazegleaming brighter. “Then tell me—how will I know if I’ve been successful?”
“I’m sure I’ll figure it out,” I said, and pulled him to me.
He let out a soft groan as our lips met, wrapping his arms around me again, and once more I was enveloped in warmth. I leaned up on tiptoe, pressing into him on the rock, as our lips moved together and the wind swirled around us. As always, Raithe was gentle, letting me set the pace, keeping his hands against my back, but I wanted more. I dropped my head to softly kiss his jawline, and he let out a ragged breath, tilting his head back and making my stomach flutter. Bolstered, I pressed my lips to his neck, and he shuddered, hands coming up to grip my shoulders.
“Sparrow.” His voice was a breathless whisper as he drew back. “Wait.”
I looked up at him, blinking. His chest heaved, his gaze bright as it met mine, but he took a deep breath and went still. “If we keep going,” he said, his gaze both regretful and apologetic, “I’m not going to be able to keep watch very effectively. Vahn is still out there, and the last thing I want is for him to get the drop on us like last time.” One hand rose, palm pressing against my cheek. “If he shows up, and I’m... distracted, even if he doesn’t kill us, Kysa certainly will.”
“Oh.” I slumped. Drawing back, I turned, suddenly feeling the chill against my skin. The discarded blankets fluttered around my ankles, and I bent to pick them up. My cheeks burned, a sharp contrast to the cold. He was right, of course. Vahn was actively hunting us. There was no time for foolishness, no time to lowerour guards even for a moment. “You’re right,” I told Raithe as I straightened. “Sorry, I wasn’t thinking. I just...” The flush in my cheeks spread to my neck, and I winced. “I’m... going to try to sleep... now. Good night, Raithe.”
He caught my wrist before I could walk away. “Don’t go,” he said as I turned to look at him. “Come back, Sparrow. Please.”
I stepped toward him, and he sighed. “Do you want to know what you do to me?” he murmured, and the hand that held my own drew me forward and placed my palm against his chest, holding it to his heart. I could suddenly feel it racing, loud and fast, beneath my fingers.
Raithe closed his eyes. “No one else has that effect on me,” he said, as my own heartbeat picked up in response. His eyes opened, pale blue and solemn, his gaze piercing my soul. “This is entirely new to me, Sparrow. I haven’t... cared for anyone like this before.” He brushed a strand of hair from my eyes. “For now, I can only protect you. For now, the mission to find the loom takes precedence over everything else. But when it’s over, if I’m still alive, I hope to show you exactly what that means.”
If I’m still alive.
My throat closed, my heart racing in my ears. If there was one fate I could unravel, I prayed it would be his.
Raithe took the blanket from my arms and wrapped it around my shoulders. “But for now,” he murmured, “I promised you a night with no bad dreams, didn’t I.”
Before I could answer, he bent and swept me effortlessly into his arms. I bit down a yelp of surprise as he stood, the wind tugging at his hair and clothes. “Raithe, what—?”
“I told you I would chase the nightmares away.” He lowered us both to the sand. Sitting with his back against the rock, he settled me in his lap and pulled the blankets close around us. “And you said you would keep me company tonight,” he said. “I think this is a suitable compromise.”
He spoke calmly, but I could hear his heartbeat, still thudding in his chest. I put a hand over it, and his breath hitched. “This won’t count as a distraction?” I challenged.
