“Not... as much of a distraction.” He pressed his lips to the top of my hood. “I’ll be right here,” he murmured. “Try to get some sleep.”
I didn’t think I could sleep. Both my mind and body felt too riled up, pulled in several different directions. But I leaned my head against his chest and listened to his heartbeat, the warmth of the blankets and his arms surrounding me. Despite the racing of his heart, Raithe’s breaths came slow and easy, a gentle rhythm lulling me to sleep. I gazed up at the sky, at the thin crescent moon high overhead, and thought about his words to me. That, when this was over, he would show me what I meant to him. I didn’t know if that thrilled or terrified me. Probably both.
I didn’t realize my eyes had drifted shut... until I looked up and was no longer myself.
I was blind. I couldn’t see anything. But I couldfeelmyself sliding through the sand. Grit passed over my scales, through my flesh and bones, disturbing the multitude of tiny creatures writhing through my insides. They were everywhere, in every part of me, squirming against muscle and tendon. In my heart, in mybrain, crawling over organ and tooth and bone. Their jaws bit at me, chewing and consuming, piercing my rotting flesh with a million tiny daggers. It was maddening, and I could do nothing about it. I had to find her, the one hidden from me. I couldn’t sense her, couldn’t see her, but I knew the shapes of her companions. Warrior, assassin, insects, fool. They would lead me to her. If I found them, she would be there, too.
I opened my eyes with a gasp.
“Easy.” Raithe leaned in, his voice low and soothing. “I’m here, Sparrow. You’re safe.”
“No.” My heart pounded in my ears. I glanced at the sky and saw that the moon had disappeared, the stars fading. Turning in Raithe’s arms, I looked up and met his concerned gaze. “Vahn is coming,” I said, and he straightened. “Right now. He’s hunting us—I don’t know how close he is.”
Raithe’s lips tightened, and he nodded once. “We need to get moving, then.” Taking my hand, he rose, pulling us both to our feet. I shivered in the cold predawn air as the blankets dropped away. “Kysa is already taking care of the rock beetles,” Raithe said, tucking the covers under his arm. “I’ll wake Halek and pack the tent. Go see if Ratuk needs you, and let Kysa know what’s going on.”
I nodded, still shivering, my skin crawling with the memory of a million insects squirming beneath my flesh. Eating me from the inside. My stomach roiled, and I clenched my jaw, hugging my arms. If I thought too much about it, I was going to be sick.
“Sparrow.” Raithe stepped in front of me, making me blinkin surprise and look up at him. His free hand rose and cupped the side of my face. Without warning, he bent down and kissed me, a very gentle, lingering kiss, causing my stomach to spin for an entirely different reason.
Pulling back, he gave me a slightly pained smile. “I’m sorry I couldn’t keep the nightmares away.”
For just a moment, the fear vanished under the intensity of his gaze. I trailed a hand down his cheek to his neck, making him shiver. “I guess you’ll have to try again tomorrow night,” I said.
His brows arched slightly, before a hint of a smile spread across his face. “I see.” Bending down, he brought his lips close to my ear, his breath feathering over my skin. “I accept the challenge,” he whispered, and placed a light kiss on my cheek before turning and walking toward the tent.
I clenched my jaw to stop myself from following him. Raithe was right; this was extremely distracting. Even with Vahn coming for us and the Loom of Maederyss still waiting to see if I could claim it, it was hard to think of anything but the night before. I couldn’t help but feel like something had changed between us.
As I walked to where Kysa was moving among the rock beetles, I caught sight of Meeka, perched on a rock and pawing through his satchel. The jair’oa’s tail stood straight up as he balanced there, gazing intently into the pouch at his waist. As I approached, his ears flattened against his skull.
“Meeka?” I asked. “Are you all right? Is something wrong?”
“Meeka is fine.” The jair’oa twitched an ear at me, still gazing into his pouch. “But star grubs still move strangely. Look.”
He pulled out one of the glowing caterpillar things, then setit down on the rock. My insides roiled. The star grub’s glow had almost completely faded, and it lay there, barely moving. I bit my lip at the realization.
“Are they all like this?” I asked the jair’oa.
“Yes.” He pulled out another and set it on the rock. It rolled over and dropped limply to the sand. “Why star grubs move strangely?” he asked, gazing up at me. I winced.
“Meeka...” I looked from the star grub to the jair’oa, who gazed back guilelessly. “I think they’re dying.”
“Die?”
“Yes.” Gingerly, I knelt and picked up the fallen grub. It lay in my palm, limp and lifeless. I wondered if the intense heat of the day followed by the chill of the night had been too much for the grubs, because the one in my hand was definitely dead.
“I’m sorry, Meeka,” I said, lowering my hand to give the grub’s body back to him. “But I think all your star grubs are going to die. Can you...” I paused as my stomach churned a little. “Can you still eat them if they’re dead?”
The jair’oa’s whiskers curled as it stared at the creature in my palm. Almost defiantly, his paws shot out, grabbed the body, and stuffed it into his jaws, biting down as he had all the times before.
He trembled, and his ears flattened to his skull again. “No magic,” he whispered. “Star grub has no magic. Magic is gone.”
I remembered what Kysa and Raithe had told me about magic. That all magic required life energy, and that energy had to come from somewhere. The Deathless Kings took it from the world around them, and the ma’jhet performed sacrificial rituals to fuel their spells. The jair’oa, it seemed, took it from everywriggling star grub body they consumed. And if the grubs were dead, the magic was no longer there.
Which meant Meeka wouldn’t be able to use magic, either. Once his supply ran out, he would be just like the rest of us.
A chill spread through my veins. Did the jair’oa rely on the star grubs to live? Without the magic from their creator king, would Meeka’s tiny body shrivel up and blow away like dust in the wind?
“Meeka,” I said, “what will happen to you when all the star grubs are gone?”
