‘Keep them safe. All of them,’ I demand of him. ‘Kay, William, the baby. Swear it.’
Jonas nods. ‘I swear it. With everything that I am, I will protect them.’
There’s not the slightest hint of doubt in his voice, and Mortidem take me, I believe him.
‘It won’t be forever,’ William replies. His youthful optimism stings between my ribs.
‘No, it won’t be forever,’ I agree, because that’s a nicer note to leave things on than talking of me dying on the Hirathean Path. Because deep down, we all know that’s what is most likely to happen. Soldiers don’t come back from the North. Knighted guards with their bonded dire wolves lose their lives to the barbarians that roam the lands. Barbarians I’m actively going in search of.
And who am I? Certainly no bonded warrior. I am the gifted – part Issen, part Morathkian, and wholly an emotional wreck.
Not exactly a hero in the making.
Yet as I look at William, I force myself to match his optimism. And then, because I desperately need to, I wrap my arms around him and squeeze him so tightly that I feel myself doubting whether I want to leave at all.
My little brother is alive. I have him with me, and yet here I am, leaving him. It goes against everything I believe in, everything I want to do, but it is the best way to protect him. And Mother and Father would have wanted me to do that.
It’s what they would have done – anything to keep us safe.
Finally, I look at Kay. ‘I love you. So much. Take care of that baby for me. I’ve made you tonics. Summer will tell you where they are. I need the little one healthy for when I meet them.’
Tears glisten in her eyes.
‘Youwillmeet them, won’t you?’ There’s no denying the quaver in her voice.
‘I will,’ I promise, glad she doesn’t have Benny or Caz’s ability to see right through me. ‘I will see you all again.’
I hug both my siblings to me, clinging to them fiercely before whirling around and striding out of the room, hoping the speed of my movements will hide the tears cascading from my eyes.
As I stalk out, I swipe the wetness from my cheeks, thankful that they are not icy. Outside, silver moonlight casts watery shadows on paving stones as I head towards the gate.
Benny, Caz, and Ruben are already mounted, and the horses are laden down. I asked Summer to prepare rations for us to take with us, and given the meals that she’s cooked over the last couple of days, I should have known better than to expect a couple of bread rolls and cold meat. There’s enough to feed an army here: bread and meats, yes, but also stewed fruits, canned to keep their freshness, dried vegetables that we can rehydrate to create broths, salted fish, biscuits, oats, and dried milk. You name it, she’s packed it.
At least it means we won’t have to worry about food, which, given how much we actually do have to worry about, is a blessing.
One mount is lacking a rider: a jet-black mare with a thin, white blaze of hair on its forehead. Blaze. Seems like as good enough a name as any.
‘Last chance to back out,’ I say as I pull myself into the saddle of my newly named steed.
Benny shrugs. ‘Not really. I’m pretty sure we can abandon you at any point we fancy.’
Without a change in expression, Caz moves her horse next to his, reaches out, and hits him over the head.
‘Thanks,’ I say to her.
‘Public service.’ She shrugs.
With Benny’s power, he surely saw Caz’s intention as she approached, yet he let her swipe at him all the same. He’s a good friend.
Ruben grins for the first time since we watched his mother disappear into Etta’s temple. ‘This is going to be fun.’
‘That’s the spirit,’ Benny says. ‘It’s best that we’re all delusional from the start.’
We ridethrough the city in silence, passing through the rings effortlessly as tired knights wave us through checkpoints with no issues. Sometimes conversation creeps into the group, but mostly we’re quiet.
There are times, though, like when we reach the third ring and Etta’s temple, that the silence becomes even more pronounced. I wonder whether we should stop and allow Ruben a moment at his mother’s final resting place, but I know that if he wanted to do that, he’d have asked, so I respect his tacit wishes once again, and we continue on into the outer rings.
Stars litter the sky above us as we slip out through the final wall and find ourselves in the deprivation and stench of the slums.
