So I will live with them all. Every rotten memory. And while she’s under my roof, so will Summer.
‘You may go,’ I repeat, my tone far gentler.
This time, she dips her head, finally lowers the saucepan, and leaves.
As the door closes, I turn to see that Jonas has recovered his breath and is sitting up, though he is pushing himself away from me at thesame time. I can’t blame him for that, though I have plenty else to blame him for.
Straightening to my full height, I take a step towards him.
‘All this time,’ I hiss. ‘You hid it from me. You hid him from us.’
He dips his head, too ashamed to even meet my eyes. ‘I know, I know, Rose.’
‘How did this come to pass?’ I demand, my fists clenching as rage surges inside me once more. ‘Why did Korvane not kill him?’
‘I don’t know. I tried to find out when I first realised who William was – I promise you, I did – but it was hard. I didn’t want to draw attention to myself, and I didn’t want to endanger him.’
I scoff. I don’t doubt that whatever his fears were, they were nothing compared to what my family went through. ‘And what did youeventuallyfind out?’
A little colour has returned to Jonas’s cheeks, but his eyes are still wary. ‘The king ordered William’s death, but someone, somehow, hid him away. It was at least a year later when he came to us, and my father simply presented him to me as a new ward.’
Anger spikes. Artur. ‘You men and your fucking fathers!’
The words explode from my mouth, but they are not the only effect of my rage. Sharp shards of ice shoot from my fingers and into the air, several of which skim Jonas’s cheeks and temples. A gasp of shock flies from both of us as blood trickles down towards his chin.
Fuck! I’m a mess. A dangerous, icy mess.
The way the power flew from me was like the ice blade that killed Oke: beyond my control. Still, I swallow the automatic apology. After all Jonas has done to me, he owes me more than those few drops of blood.
He owes me so much more.
Jonas brushes his cheek, smearing the blood in a line. He looks at me finally, yet not with the fear I was expecting, but with deep concern, and fuck him for that. ‘You need to get that power under control, Rose.’
‘Don’t you think I know that?’ I spit, and it makes me angry all over again that he dares to act as if he cares after all his lies and deception. No, not just angry. Hurt.
I might not have always agreed with Jonas’s decisions in the Retterheld. The way he wanted to go it alone at the end, not to mention hisconstantly patronising me, but I believed I could trust him. Trust that he would be there to help me if I truly needed it. Maybe even help me with Kay and his father. But in a single moment Jonas has shown me that there is not a single person in the Wrohelm court I can trust. I was a fool to ever think otherwise.
‘I am sorry,’ Jonas says earnestly, as if a simple apology can right this awful wrong. ‘About William. About everything. Truly. I really did think about telling you sooner, but I just thought that until the trials were over, it was safer if you didn’t know.’
‘Safer forwho?’ I snarl.
‘For you and William, of course. I didn’t know how you’d react if you discovered that Florian is alive. You were rash enough as it was. You needed to be clear-headed to get through the trials. I wanted you to survive, Rose.’
The laugh that rattles in my throat is bitter and cold. ‘Oh right. So you hid my brother from me so that I’d remain clear-headed, did you?’ I spit. ‘It wasn’t your right to keep him hidden from me, you fucking bastard!’
Magic pulses through me, but whether it’s mine, returned to me by the Goddess, or whatever the fuck is left in me from the third trial, I cannot say.
Trying to stem my panic, I take some deep breaths. Being the gifted or not, using Issen ice magic is enough to get me executed.
And I know all too well that Korvane would be delighted to have an excuse to be rid of me.
‘Does he know?’ I ask finally. ‘Does William know who he really is?’
‘No,’ Jonas says with absolute certainty. ‘No, even I didn’t realise until I was fifteen, maybe sixteen. When I confronted my father about it, he … he …’ Jonas’s voice dies into nothing.
‘Your fucking father,’ I mutter.
Jonas’s expression shifts. ‘He did what he thought was best, Rose. He protected him and raised William to be a good man.’
