My mind is desperate for a theme. A journey. A place to hit on someone and make Vincenza proud of me. Like a library! Or café.
I pick the library.
It’s not as gorgeously decorated—but not to any detriment. It’s clear this place started off in a wonderful state and only needed to be given the barest amount of thematic love. I find myself studying the order of books on the shelves and comparing the organization system to the parlour. I even correct a slightly misplaced book out of habit.
A woman with devious eyes surprises me from behind to comment, “oh my. Nice dress.”
“Th-thanks. I was—It’s anice dress.”
The woman grabs my hips and casually asks, “do you wanna fuck me?”
I frantically look around the room, definitely noticing at least two people who look up from their books to judge us.
She rolls her eyes. “It’d be fun, and you could loosen up. This corset must be pressing on your lungs.”
“It’s actually mostly comfortable.”
“I could show you more comfort.” She winks. “Brown Eyes, don’t you want to swim with me and feel what taking a consort is like?”
Vincenza would want me to say yes. The Great Ring would reward me if I said yes. My parents would berate me if I didn’t say yes.
Just like a needle prick. A touch and it’ll be over.
“Yes.”
“Kiss me,” she breathes against my lips.
Just the prick.
“I’ve never kissed before. Can you… lead?”
“I could tell. Your eyes are still, like an old well.” She giggles and leans in.
A first kiss. Something to make Vincenza proud.
Nothing more than a knife digging under skin, over before the wound even clots.
But my stubborn heart is inventing problems.
I stop her advance by my hand on her chest. “You don’t think I’m a Ringborn, right?”
She incredulously scans my whole body. “Aren’t you?”
I whimper, “no. I-I thought you…”
“Sorry, I’m genuinely apologetic about that then.” She steps back. “I didn’t mean to hit on you so brazenly. Enjoy the rest of your night.”
She leaves.
I was just a consort.
I can no longer bring myself to stay in the library.
There’s no place for me in the café; food won’t bring pleasure to this rocking heart. There’s no place for it in any of the amusements; a dance would probably give me a heart attack. And—
The Great Ring is out. I just want to lay on the viewing hill, stare up, and feel this moment slip away as the future grabs me.
I think I left a few notes out of my decision. I forgot that couples would be the most common group out here. Picnicking on comfortable blankets while cuddling and sharing meals. The smell too—everyone’s smoking.
