Riley nods slowly, her eyes closed as she toys with her fingers. “I’m getting a disruptive vibe. Also, their goalie is afraid of geese. That could be helpful.”
Normally, I’d steer this back to reality and be the anchor. But since Alisha’s very public, very tearful accusation in the streets of Milan earlier today, I’ve beendrifting in and out of my thoughts. The looks from my team aren’t hostile; they are wary. Like a wall of polite professionalism where easy camaraderie used to be. They talk tactics around me, not with me.
I hate that I’m reliving this all over again. The team knew there was a court hearing that involved me a while back, but it was quickly dismissed, and no further questions were asked.
It feels like a nightmare that I can’t seem to escape.
Paige has lightened up on throwing her signature sarcasm my way. Rissa’s chaos has become muted in my presence. Even Riley’s predictions feel filtered. It’s like I’m wearing a sign that says “POTENTIAL PREDATOR. HANDLE WITH CAUTION.”
The weight of it, on top of my punishing silence with Violet, that will finally end in the morning because I can’t take it, is like a stone in my throat. I can’t lead my team out onto the ice for the biggest game of our lives with this between us.
Not anymore.
I set my water bottle down, a bit too loudly, and the three of them glance at me.
“Alisha,” I start, my voice coming out flat. My usual internal storm is quiet. “She said I abused her.” I speak low enough that I don’t draw attention from anyone but my own team. This cafeteria is crawling with people who would pounce at the opportunity to out me as an abuser or a sex freak.
Rissa stops twirling her fry, Riley’s fingers fall to her lap, and Paige leans back, crossing her arms over her chest.
“I didn’t,” I continue, holding Paige’s gaze because it’s the hardest one to get through. She knows shit went down, but I think it hurt when I refused to elaborate. She knows I don’t get close to people or confide in anyone, but I think she assumed I’d lean on someone. And she was disappointed it wasn’t her. “What happened was… a scene, of sorts.”
“A scene?” Riley repeats, and Rissa nudges her in the arm to stop talking.
I swallow, trying to push down the fear of opening up to people. This is necessary. I can’t hurt my career by refusing to talk to those closest to me. And as hard as it is to admit, they are the only friends I have.
“A BDSM scene,” I clarify, not making eye contact with anyone as I admit it.
“One night, I confided in Alisha. I’d concocted a contract that outlined everything I was willing to do, in addition to my hard boundaries. I asked her to do the same.” I clear my throat and take a sip of water. “She showed up with the contract in hand, slammed it onto the table, and pounced on me. I asked if she’d signed it, and she said she did. She said she’d read everything and was ready for whatever I wanted to do.”
The temperature in this room feels like it increases by twenty degrees.
I adjust in my seat.
“We were deep into it. Dom and sub.” These words catch the attention of the rest of the team, and those who weren’t already listening are now turning their chairs toward our table.
Rissa’s eyebrows are climbing up the more I speak. Riley is nodding as if completely understanding. And Paige is just staring at me, waiting for the full story so she can figure out where to go from here.
“We played. It was mediocre at best. She was giggling and kept breaking headspace.”
Rissa holds up a hand, interrupting me.
“Give us full details, Skye.” Her tone is far from joking. “I don’t live this lifestyle, so I don’t understand what that means. I need to know why she said you hurt her.”
I exhale and take another sip of water, adjusting my chair again and wiping my palms on my jeans. I never get nervous, but I’m throwing myself into full exposure here, and everyone wants a piece of my past.
“I had her wear a specific outfit.”
Rissa tries to hide a smirk. She’s into this story now, and it makes me feel a little better that she’s not judging, but actually enjoying what I have to say.
“I had her on all fours, facing the headboard. I brought out the paddle, but I used my hand instead to get her used to the sensation.” I hold up my hands and add quickly, “I didn’t hit her hard. It was just a small spank to see how well she was going to do.”
Paige smirks, enjoying the fact that I’m actually antsy as I talk. I exhale again, feeling like my friends are slowly breaking out of the distant shell and transforming back into their usual selves.
“When she whimpered,” I continue, “I took that as a sign of arousal. I went to spank her again, and she rolled out of the way, causing me to smack her in the arm.” I sigh. “She jumped off the bed, accusing me of hitting her and abusing her.” The rest of the story starts falling from my lips now, uncontrollably. “She got the media involved and tried to ruin my career. She said I was a freak.”
Riley leans forward now, grabbing my hand and squeezing. Normally, I wouldn’t allow anyone to touch me, but this is a soothing feeling that I didn’t know I needed. I’ve felt so far away from everyone since we ran into Alisha, and now, I’m accepting anything my team has to offer me.
“So, she wanted to play kinky games,” Rissa starts. “But didn’t do her homework, had a bad time, and decided to call it a crime?” She shakes her head, a piece of her chaotic energy returning. “Babe. That’s like signing up for a marathon without training and then suing the organizers because your feet hurt.”
