I was barely aware of him unlatching my wrists except for the tingling of blood flow. He didn’t lift me from the swing. He simply let gravity and my weak knees help lower me onto his lap where he sat on the floor.
I wasn’t a very good bubble since I was pretty sure I wasn’t supposed to sink, but that didn’t matter.
Nothing mattered right then.
Nothing but being in his arms.
I wasn’t sure how long we stayed like that before the endorphins and adrenaline and whatever else seeped from me. As it did, I slowly became aware of my body again. I noticed Tripp’s hand toying between my legs, but it took me a long moment to realize what he was doing.
Gathering our mixed releases to paint across my marred ass. It stung, but not in a bad way.
It took me a while longer to realize I was still crying.
I wish I hadn’t realized it.
Because once I became aware of the stupid tears, everything pushed in. All the weight that’d been lifted for those freeing minutes was back.
Tenfold.
I tried to box them up.
I tried to choke them down.
But I couldn’t.
Devastation crashed over me, painful needle pricks to my bubble body until I felt like I was plummeting down, down,down.
I could hear the panic in Tripp’s voice. “Where does it hurt? What’s wrong? Dammit, Greer, why didn’t you say stop?”
It was so hard to speak, but I forced the words out. “Not. You. Not. That.”
My body trembled like Jell-O in an earthquake.
“Whoa, hey, okay,” Tripp said gently, cuddling me closer. “Stay with me.”
I wanted to. I didn’t want to be pulverized when I hit the ground. The wall. Whatever it was I was hurtling toward.
“Open your eyes, baby.”
I did.
“Open them, Greer. Now.”
Okay, I didn’t. But at his firm order, I did.
Grudgingly.
“Look at me,” he added. Once I had, he smiled. “Good. You’re safe. It’s okay. I’ve got you. Take a deep breath.”
I wanted to do that, too, but there was an elephant on my chest that was making it difficult.
“Slow. Inhale nice and slow.”
It was more of a strained squeak, but it worked to get oxygen into my tight lungs. That was better than drowning in my swimming head.
“Exhale now. Good job. Keep going.” He brushed my hair back from my face before gently turning me to look outward. “There’s the swing.”
I had no clue why he was pointing it out, but if he thought I was about to climb back into it, he was very,verywrong. I was too busy trying not to be crushed to death.
