Tests were being conducted, but Orsen knew. Ambrose had said he’d killed her. Killed Orsen’s mother, and now a skeleton had been dug up. Orsen sipped his water, rocking back on the swing. His shoulder hurt, and he had to go back to the hospital to have the stitches removed in a day or so, but he didn’t want to go. He didn’t want to see the looks of pity on the nurses’ faces. They made him cringe inside. He hadn’t set out to kill Ambrose, but he’d had no choice, and now he didn’t know what to do with himself. He would be eighteen soon and he needed… he didn’t know what.
“Orsen.”
Orsen looked up at Crompton and gave him a weak smile. Crompton had told him he would have a place to stay and had kept his word. After giving Orsen some time to rest at the hospital, he’d shown up and told TJ that he would take care of him. Surprisingly, TJ hadn’t argued that much.
When the hospital had discharged Orsen, Crompton had been waiting outside with his truck. Orsen sat in the passenger seat, staying silent, watching the world pass by as Crompton drove. He had nothing to say. He’d been like that after TJ had interviewed him. He didn’t want to go over what had happened. He didn’t want to talk about it, or think about it, or see the images in his mind. He’d killed someone. Taken someone’s life, even if it had been to stop that person from killing him.
The nightmares were enough. He didn’t need to revisit it during the day, too. Crompton eased down on the swing next to him and passed him a plate with a couple of sandwiches on it. Orsen took the plate, murmured his thanks, and forced himself to eat one. Since that night, his appetite had deserted him, and if it wasn’t for Crompton, he wouldn’t have eaten at all.
Crompton and a couple of his farm hands kept an eye on him, and even though he should be thankful, he resented it as well. Resented that he felt the way he did, and that others had to take care of him.
“TJ needs to come out and ask you a few questions.”
Nodding, Orsen murmured, “He said he might have to.”
“You know he wouldn’t if he didn’t need to.”
“I know. He’s been really good to me.”
“He turned out all right.” Crompton’s gruff voice made Orsen smile slightly. An ornery man who didn’t suffer fools rarely made unnecessary comments or complimented people because it was a nice thing to do. If he said something nice, he meant it.
“He’s been kind to me.” TJ had spoken to him softly, making sure Orsen felt well enough to be interviewed, and when hecould see Orsen struggling, he would stop the interview and leave. Cody, his partner, had visited him too, and even though Orsen barely knew him, it had helped. Helped more when Cody had told him a little about his life.
From what he’d said, it seemed Cody had gone through some dark times and appeared to understand Orsen. “I like Cody.”
“That boy.” Crompton leaned back in the swing and pushed it gently. “I remember when he left. Thought he was an idiot and would be dead within a month.”
“He came back, though.”
“You only have to see the way he looks at TJ to know why he came back.”
“You’ve seen them together?” Orsen sat back next to Crompton. “I don’t think I have.” Maybe once in the hospital?
“Had to go to the station and saw them together. Never seen a man so whipped like TJ,” Crompton grunted. “Went to call him out on it, but Cody set me straight. Won’t have anyone say anything nasty to TJ.”
“It’s a good thing they have each other.” Orsen wanted that one day. Someone who would stand with him, help keep him safe. Even if he had that, he wouldn’t know because he’d never experienced it. Would he walk away, never understanding, or would he stay? He didn’t know about life and relationships. He only knew hurt and pain and anger. What would it be like to wake up to someone who would protect you and try to keep you safe? Be there through all the good times and the bad? He felt like Cody had that with TJ, and that was why he protected him. “I think something bad happened to Cody.”
“I don’t know the details, but something did. Whatever it was, it changed him into who he is today.”
“He’s not much older than me, and has lived a life I know nothing about.”
“That’s because you had to keep Ambrose happy. I should have shot him when I had the chance.”
Orsen winced. “I should have done something.”
“You’re a minor. You’re not responsible for the wrongs Ambrose committed.”
“I always thought she hated me.” Orsen murmured the words. He didn’t know if he wanted Crompton to hear them or not.
“If the skeleton is Allison, we’ll give her a damn good funeral.”
Orsen sniffed and glanced at the plate in his hand. His chest tight, he swallowed. “I don’t know if I want it to be her. I don’t want her to be dead. I want to wake up one day and find she’s come back for me. That she didn’t forget me. That someone loves me.” The plate shimmered, then disappeared.
“I’m no good at this.” Orsen let Crompton pull him close, and he shuddered, his face wet and his throat scratchy.
“Why didn’t they love me? What did I do wrong?”
“Ah kid, it wasn’t you. You didn’t do anything wrong. You had shitty luck having Ambrose for a dad.”
