“That’s about as much as you’ll ever know.” My smile’s weak, but then, so is everything about me right now.
I got an infection in the brand and it’s taken weeks to heal. The only perk has been watching Maxim nurse me—a fascinating sight.
The major downside?
He’s refused to put out.
It’s not that I want him to fuck me. I just… God, that whole mess with the pledging ceremony screwed with my head.
I know exactly how Wynter’s feeling—like I want to be left alone, butalso like I can’t.
Like I know people are watching me.
Like I know that this is a test in and of itself.
I can only imagine how many people freak the fuck out shortly after being inducted into the brotherhood and then want to leave.
I have no desire to, but I sure as hell feel like shit.
“You can tell me anything, Vicky.”
I shoot him a smile as I pat his cheek.
His promise is sweet, but I know it’s not the truth. Even if he believes it right now.
The only people I can speak candidly with are Maxim and Wynter.
They know the rules of the game. Rules that Shay can never learn. Not if he’s to remain clean for the decades ahead.
I’ve sullied my soul for this boy who holds so much promise…
I can only pray that he won’t let me down like I’ve let him down.
I know he’d never have asked me to do what I have in his name. But it’s too late for that. I’m here. I’ve killed. Twice. Now, I have to live with my actions.
As we step into the elevator, I breathe in, sharply, when he accidentally nudges my arm.
Fire licks along my nerve endings, as much as if the branding happened yesterday. It’s driving me crazy. I can’t wait for it to be healed already.
Shay shoots me a concerned look. “You’re not ready for this.”
“I am!” I argue mulishly, though he’s right.
Maxim had to work in the city tonight and the last thing I wanted was to be alone. Plus, I miss my friends.
We’re all hanging out at Zach, Denny, and Pecan’s place. There’s a hockey game on and Denny’s watching it from Madrid, where she’s currently on a study exchange program.
The only thing I want to do with hockey is push my wound onto the ice to cool it the fuck down, but I’ll deal with it.
I need company.
I need junk food.
And I need to feel like my life is returning to some semblance of normalcy.
I never figured that I had it in me to do what the Veronians asked.
But I do.
