“Yeah,” I said. “Sometimes at work, I hear the fellas tell the same story over and over every night.” The pick-up lines were always the same too. The drunken boasts. I couldn’t actually remember the last time somebody caught me off guard. Except Ford. He’d definitely caught me off guard.
Not for the first time since Daisy’s I thought of him and his confusing behavior. It was like he wanted me but he was ashamed of it. It made my stomach sour every time I thought about it, so I pushed those thoughts away.
Gretchen continued on. “Right? Like, don’t you have anything better to talk about?”
“Yeah. I once heard this guy who comes to my work tell at least five people about how he needed a filling. Nothing happened with the filling. He just needed one. That was it. That was the whole story. But he told every single person who talked to him.”
“Exactly.” She laughed and hit the steering wheel. “Like, do you think we all care about your dental hygiene?”
“Sometimes I want to yell, ‘Nobody cares!’” I let out a breath. Daddy did that too. He’d tell anybody that looked at him how Momma left. And that was over twenty years ago. My mouth kept running. “But then I sort of end up feeling bad for them because if they have to tell strangers about the little stuff it means they don’t have nobody else to tell.” I couldn’t believe I said that. My cheeks heated. I didn’t know why I was so honest but her rawness brought it out in me.
She was too quiet and I waited for her to call me an idiot. I’d punch her in the face and jump out of the car.
But eventually, she just said, “Huh. That’s a good point. I didn’t think about it like that. Maybe I should be more patient.”
Tension released from me when I realized she wasn’t going to make fun of me.
“But also some people are just boring,” I added.
“God save me if I ever live that life.” She prayed to the roof of the car.
She pulled off at the next exit and I felt like I was a world away from Green Valley. A giant cement sign for the University of Tennessee in old-fashioned script introduced the area. Massive, fancy buildings were lined with manicured lawns and planted flowers. Every block had a new, interesting looking building with signs like "College of Agricultural Sciences" or "Haslam College of Business."
“This is all one school?” I asked as she drove through streets packed with students. Each new turn added to the knot currently twisting up my insides.
“Yeah. Pretty campus, huh?”
I swallowed down a sick feeling. I'd lived my whole life less than an hour away and I'd never been here during the day. I’d gone to a few parties that I hardly remembered but I didn't want to think about that. I’d thought this would be an easy request. Change my outfit and act classy, no biggie, but now I realized how wrong I'd been. I was gonna stick out like Reverend Seymour at the Dragon Bar. Not that Reverend Seymour would ever be at the Dragon Bar because he knew where he belonged. I was so anxious now I couldn’t sit still.
We turned off the main road toward residential housing.
“Oh look, we’re getting close. This is a nice neighborhood.”
I nodded, taking it all in but unable to speak. I didn’t fit in here. My clothes that made me feel sexy at home seemed tacky and out of place here.
“Looks like you’re just around the corner.” She turned the car and stopped in front of an older two story. “This house is amazing. I love the classic Victorian architecture. That plaque on the porch means it’s a historic home.”
I nodded, too in awe to speak. This couldn’t be where Ford lived. He was a teacher and he had a roommate. I pictured a run-down student house like the college party I’d gone to—hardwood floors stained with beer and no furniture.
But even from the car, it was easy to tell the house was as beautiful on the inside as it was on the outside. The gray siding was highlighted by a bright blue front door with matching window trim. The front room had big bay windows just made for a giant Christmas tree to fill it in winter.
With leaves sprinkling down from the surrounding trees, the heavy clouded dark sky, and the uncarved gourds and pumpkins on the front porch, it was a perfect autumn scene. My heart clenched in my chest. This home was beautiful—way nicer than any home I’d ever lived in.
I wasn’t going to fit in here. I needed to be back with the boys and the bars. This was a mistake.
“You okay?” she asked.
I nodded my head but I gripped the car door handle like it was keeping me from spinning right off the earth.
“Go on. I’ll help with the bags.”
She was out of the car again before I could answer. I wasn’t ready. The car felt safer than going in. The Black Demons were a little scary sometimes, but at least they knew me.
Gretchen tapped my window. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” I gathered courage I didn’t feel and got out.
“You don’t have to tell me anything, but you don’t look so good.” She squeezed my hand and it was so unexpected I turned back to look at her. “You tell me if you aren’t safe. I’ll take you straight away from here. The bat was just the beginning of the weapons I’ve got packed away.”
