“You should know something about me,” I said.
Ford turned from where he leaned on the door frame to watch me. I kept talking.
“I’m not a good person. I’ve said it before but for some reason, you seem to think I’m better than I am. Especially after how you defended me to those girls.”
I glanced at Ford, it was dark but I felt him studying me. “Girls?”
“At the dance. The way you stood up for me.”
He huffed an annoyed puff of air. “Not even worth the energy it takes to think of them again. They’re nothing.”
“Well, it still meant a lot to me.” I cleared my throat. “I’ve done bad things. I got mixed up in a world that I’m not proud of. I’ve tried to clean up my act a little but after I was kicked out of the Iron Wraiths, I went a little mad. I didn’t tell you about all this. But I think you should know who I really am.”
“I know who you are now. That’s all that matters.” His voice was thick and deep in the quiet car.
“You think you do. You think you can dress me up and change who I am. But I’m ugly on the inside, Ford. My whole life I’ve known the path I’d be on.”
“How’s that?”
“I got pretty when I was young. I developed young just like my momma. I got my looks from her and everybody said it was only a matter of time till I got knocked up at sixteen like her. She ran away, but I didn’t. I stayed for Daddy and then Jethro and now for the Black Demons.”
“You like living here?”
I shrugged, not sure if he saw or not. “I don’t have a choice now. I never did. My momma’s leaving set my path.”
He remained quiet.
“The thing is Jethro got me mixed up—no. I got mixed up with drugs and a wild life with the Iron Wraiths for a while. I can’t take that back.”
“That’s true. You can’t change your past. It doesn’t define you. It’s only part of you.”
“It’s easy to say that but you can’t understand what it’s like. I’m not trying to get into anything right now. You were so amazing back there. I just wanted you to know. People are gonna say stuff like that and expect me to be a certain way because that’s how I’ve always been.”
“Is that what you want now?”
“Just ask anybody in that town. Where else could I go? After all this, where would I go?” I thumbed back to where we left.
“Just because everybody says things about you, doesn’t make them true. You get to decide who you are.”
I thought about that. He’d been spouting out the same nonsense since we met but he didn’t get it. Even after seeing me with those men, he still thought that. When was he going to realize that not everybody could change who they were at heart?
I shook my head. “Anyway. I don’t know why I said all that.”
“Thanks for telling me about your past.”
I twisted my mouth to the side. There was a little more to my reputation but I was suddenly so tired. I had to focus on getting us home safely. Eventually, I slowed to a stop in front of our house. I sighed, feeling a hundred years old. The night had been long—and strange.
“Thank you again for saving me.”
He frowned and then winced.
“Come on, let’s go inside so I can clean you up.”
* * *
Clifford
The counter in the bathroom was cluttered with bloody washcloths and cotton balls. I sat on the toilet seat, head leaning back and eyes closed, processing the events of the night. A headache, caused by bad choices and adrenaline, pounded behind my eyes. The full impact of my wounds wasn’t hitting me yet but based on her expression, it wasn't good. Her face was clear of makeup, revealing smooth, creamy skin and long eyelashes that swept her cheeks as she examined me. Her full lips pursed in concentration.
