“Yeah, but what did you do?” Wes asked. He drained his bottle of beer and set it back down loudly before going on. “Did you tell her how you felt? Did you explain that you sent the notes and Chagny is a lying bastard? Did you fight for her even a little?”
“Language,” Ma scolded.
“Why should I?” I asked. I sounded petulant. Dammit.
“Because that is what you do when you love someone,” Wes said with vehemence I’d never seen in him. “You don’t just give up before it begins. I’m really starting to see a pattern with you now. This quitting. Your talent, as always, comes so easily. You work so hard, but you quit before you can ever fail.”
Kelly grabbed her husband’s hand and made a face. “What you and Wes have told me about Kim, she has had some trouble in her past right? Well, Kim is chasing her life now. She is trying to do the best thing forher. She has made bad choices before. Maybe she’s just trying to do the smart thing now. For her. He offered her everything she wanted.”
“She doesn’t want any of it,” I spat. “She only thinks she does.”
“Yeah, there you go. Deciding what she wants,” Ma said. “Shethinksthat’s what she wants. Love is about wanting what the other person wants and trying to make it happen for them. Supporting their dreams. And Chagny tells her all the right things. I’m not saying I like him, but he lays it out for her. He makes it an obvious choice. You just said that Kim struggles with making the right choices.”
“Yeah.”
“She’s trying to be smart.” Wes slammed his fist on the table. “You’re broody and moody. You run around the world leaving any time things get hard. She doesn’t know where she stands with you. Did you talk about any sort of life outside her playing? About what her performance means toyou? Chagny says, hey, I’ll do everything for you.”
“He won’t challenge her.”
“No. He won’t and that’s exactly why she picked him. But you have to make it clear to her that you are worth the fear and the uncertainty. You’re the real deal,” Wes said. Kelly reached out and grabbed his hand to squeeze it.
“What do I have to offer her?” My question came out low and pathetic.
The whole table groaned.
“What?” I asked.
“Don’t make me say it, man. Tell me you aren’t that dumb,” Wes shook his head.
“What?”
“Would you ever let anything harm her?” Ma asked.
“Will you ever stop wanting her? Caring for her?” Dad asked.
“Will you always want to talk to her? Hear from her? Do you want her to be that person that knows all the little things about you? And have her be the one that knows everything about you?” Kelly asked.
Wes said, “Is she the one who can make you laugh and hold your hand? That will push you in return? Will you always put her first? Make her dreams, your dreams?”
My throat tightened. I felt queasy. “Yes,” I rasped.
“Well that’s love, man. That’s what you offer her. Real Love. Capital R, capital L. Chagny talks the talk but the second Kim doesn’t make him money anymore …” Wes shrugged.
“Chagny doesn’t love her.” Kelly gestured to her phone. “Not if these costumes and performances are for him and not her. She looks miserable in those pictures. She’s trying, but her eyes are dead.”
“It sounds to me like Kim made the best decision she could in that moment. That’s all you can expect from people,” Dad said.
“Well, she needs to do better.” I sounded like an asshole, even to my own ears.
“Gosh, you’ve always held people to such a high standard.” My mom turned to Dad. “Is that because of something we did? Did we put pressure on him?”
“No. That was stardom. It fucked with his head.”
“Wesley.”
“Sorry, Ma. But it did. He sets unrealistic expectations for people. Meanwhile he won’t take off that fricking mask and just hides.”
“I’m right here,” I said. “And she could change. If she really wanted to.”
