“I heard the rumors too. Absolutely absurd. Trust me, I’ve talked to Richard and Andrew about it. My parents too. Nobody will stand for this.”
“You have?” I asked.
“Yes. Can you imagine? You and Devlin? Like he has anything to offer you.” His face was contorted with disgust. “Even if he does want you as his little pet, I won’t let him use you up like that. You’d be wasted as some moody artist’s plaything.”
“Roddy, I didn’t do anything. I didn’t want the solo.”
“I know. It’s okay. Don’t worry about anything.” He pulled me in for another hug. “The only reason these rumors are even going is because they’re trying to sell seats. It’s abhorrent and selfish. But don’t worry. I have a plan. I’ll take care of everything.”
Relief settled into my bones. “Thank you.”
I stepped forward to rest my head on his chest. He smelled nice, sort of clean like baby powder. He was shorter than I remembered. And bonier. I adjusted my cheek to find a more comfortable spot.
“Don’t worry about the gossips. You earned that chair. You did earn it. You work so hard.”
I squeezed my eyes shut against the worry.
“If it’s really upsetting you though, you don’t have to do it, you know?” he said cautiously.
“What do you mean?”
He tugged me to the side. “Listen. There’s interest in a tour. If you wanted to leave today, I could have everything set up with a few phone calls. This could be your chance to get away from this place. Away from the gossips and Green Valley.”
“Leave Green Valley?” I asked.
Could I escape my past? Would it be that easy? I had always hoped Roddy would be the reason things changed. I didn’t want to upset the symphony. I didn’t want to ruin Devlin’s chances at success. If I went on that stage in this state, if I tried to play the solo, I’d hurt too many people to count.
“Carla would be happy to take your place. The people who think you didn’t earn this would be happy. Not that that matters. But I’d be happy too. I’ve always wanted more for you. I want to keep you safe. You decide, and I’ll take you away from all of this.”
My heart was beating so hard my body shook. I couldn’t take a full breath, and the hallway blurred.
I didn’t know if I wanted to do that. But I also couldn’t face the thought of stepping on that stage and playing Carla’s solo. I thought of the hurt and sadness on Carla’s face. I thought of Devlin and my confession in the hallway. I know he’d said it wasn’t my fault. I know he wanted me to play for me, but he didn’t understand that it was happening again. My success was hurting people. I couldn’t do that again. I couldn’t stay and hurt people.
I could take myself out of the equation though. I could go away. Changing my name had been step one but I needed to leave Green Valley to truly become Christine Day. I would just explain that it was all happening too fast.
“Come on. Let’s go. We will go to my folk’s place and figure this out.” Roddy pushed open the back exit. He tugged me along after.
“Wait. I need to—”
“Where are you going?” Devlin yelled.
I spun to see him eating up ground in only a few steps. His fists were balled and his face was furious.
“I need some time to talk, Maestro,” I said.
His focus was on me, brows furrowed and chest heaving. “You can’t just leave. You’re first chair.”
“She doesn’t want to be here. You can’t make her stay.” Roddy put himself between us.
“I wasn’t speaking to you,” Devlin growled.
Roddy crossed his arms.
“Move or I’ll move you.”
“Roddy, it’s okay—” I started.
“It’s not okay,” Roddy said. “You are scared. Look at you, you’re shaking and pale. And he’s done this. All of this. He’s pushed you to this point.”
