“Yeah,” I said sadly.
“We have to stick together,” she said.
“I agree. I don’t want you out of my life again.” I grabbed her hand and squeezed.
She squeezed my hand back. “No ex left behind.”
“Damn straight,” I said and leaned in for a hug. God, I had missed her. It was like I could relax my shoulders after months of having them up to my ears.
When we pulled apart, she wiped at her face quickly and I pretended not to notice.
“Sanders has got to work through some things,” she explained. “If I had known he’d be so emotionally unavailable, I would have never tried to set you up. Do you miss him?” she asked without judgment.
I chewed my lip. My throat was too tight to talk. I nodded.
“Such an idiot,” she repeated.
I shrugged. “I agree.” Then I cleared my throat because I was an idiot too. “What’re we going to do about Kim?”
“I’ll call Suzie back up. I have a plan.”
“Of course you do,” I said.
“We’ll talk to her when she gets back, but whatever it is she needs, we’ll be there for her.”
I nodded. I missed this. This devotion to friendship.
“She needs to decide for herself,” Gretchen said. “No more controlling. When she’s ready for us, we’ll be there.”
I grabbed her hand and squeezed. “Good plan.”
“But also, I might have to take a bat to that dipshit Roddy’s precious car.”
Chapter 27
Sanders
Ihadn’t expected to return to Green Valley until I had a plan. I sure as hell hadn’t expected to be back at a hospital so soon. The smell of disinfectant made my stomach sour. The squeak of shoes in the halls brought me back to those final moments with my father. My skin itched to leave, my palms sweated. But I was done making decisions for me. Or rather, I was done making decisions based on fear. I took a breath and pushed into the hospital room.
My throat tightened at the sight of him. His leg was in a cast, rigged to balance a foot off his bed using some sort of medieval-looking device. His color was not great and his beard and hair were more than a little unkempt, even for him.
My face must have betrayed the pain I felt seeing Skip like this. Seeing him off his feet took me by surprise. He was the one that was strong and steady.
“I’m going to be fine,” Skip said. “You didn’t have to come all the way down here.” He faced the window and didn’t turn to look at me when he spoke.
“Come on, mate,” I spoke softly.
Skip and I had hardly seen each other most of July and August. With September coming to an end, I realized how far we’d grown apart. Once he moved out, I focused on wrapping up any other loose ends with Outside the Box. When we had spoken, it was brief and only about the crumbling business. We didn’t talk about partnering with the Lodge. We didn’t talk about the future of the business in Green Valley at all. I didn’t even know he had come back here until I got the call from Ford of all people to tell me.
I’d fucked up so big I didn’t even know how I was going to salvage our friendship. Or if I could. All this time I had felt like I had to deal with my suffering alone, so I pushed everyone away. Now that I really was alone, I realized that I’d been an idiot.
“Of course, I’m here,” I said.
He glared at me. Finally. I was happy to see the anger. Anger was better than neutrality. Apathy scared me more than hatred.
I pulled the uncomfortable wooden chair next to his bed and sat down. “I hate this. I hate everything I’ve done. I hate seeing you like this,” I said. Emotion made my throat tight. I wouldn’t try to hide it though. I spent enough time pretending to be fine when I was suffering.
“Sucks, doesn’t it?” Skip asked. “Seeing somebody you care about in a hospital bed?”
