“So what? Come on. We aren’t leaving here until we’ve all had the best time.”
“Why did that feel like a threat?” Sanders whispered in my ear.
Goose bumps tickled down my neck. “Because it was. I need another drink.”
He pulled back to look at me with concern. “Are you okay?”
I said, “Of course. It’s a party with half of Green Valley. Let’s have a great time.”
Gretchen and I exchanged a look. My heart ached. The irony, I realized, was that we were fighting because she pushed me toward a man I was avoiding to help preserve our friendships.No ex left behind. That was the promise we made to each other.
I lost track of time a bit after that. Bits and pieces came through my fog. Gretchen was chatting to Jack and Skip, flirting loudly. Jack smiled easily back and Skip frowned, looking a little uncomfortable. This only made her try harder to bring him out of his shell.
“Careful there, boys,” I said. “Those’re her scheming eyes.” My voice slurred more than I wanted.
Gretchen crossed her arms. She was about to say something when Ford loudly asked Suzie to dance, to my great surprise. He didn’t strike me as the type but the two of them on the floor? Well, shit, of course they looked good. They loved each other so deeply, when I watched them sway, my chest ached with something I couldn’t identify. Sanders nudged me, asked me if I wanted to dance. My head dropped to the table. The world spun and it felt like that was the only way to keep me from flying away.
“Hell no,” I said and turned my head to look at him. “Walkin’ might even be a lot to ask.”
He rubbed a circle on my back and slid some water toward me. “Need to go talk?”
I groaned.
My carefully controlled worlds were clashing together. This night hadn’t gone to plan at all. I felt pulled in different directions and I couldn’t handle any of it. I was embarrassed for misinterpreting closeness with Sanders. I wasn’t sure how to act with both my friends and coworkers around. And seeing Gretchen reminded me of how much still needed to be said. It was all too much. For all of my attempts to tightly control my life, it was spinning out around me.
“I’ll be right back,” I said. When I stood, the floor slid sideways and I had to grip the table.
I felt Gretchen eye me as I made my way to the bathroom. I was tired of holding on so tight.
I needed some air.
* * *
Sanders
Well,I screwed up.
Roxy’s smile when I walked into Genie’s made me soar. She was beautiful with her hair flowing around her, the artistic flowers and designs on her arms fully on display. Her long legs went for days in short shorts. She looked more relaxed that I’d seen her since Denver. She looked … happy to see me. Until she saw Skip. Her gaze shuttered and her smile became the fake one she used at the Lodge. I had completely misread the invitation. I wished I could go back in time and understand that this was Roxy’s attempt to connect.
No, that was a lie. I knew. I was just scared. I didn’t want to show up alone and cross a line.
I kept an eye on her as her friends chatted. Roxy kept tossing back drinks at a rate that surprised me. She had always tried to appear put together and professional around me and here she was getting hammered. Her lithe build didn’t seem equipped to handle the vodka at the rate she was drinking it. I wouldn’t be able to handle that much.
“Roxy, here.” Suzie slid her a glass of water and a basket of fried pickles.
Roxy didn’t say anything to her friend but did take a pickle and sipped the water. There was an aggression to her drinking that worried me. Like she was trying to prove a point. I wasn’t sure if it was aimed at Gretchen sitting at the other end of the table. They carefully avoided talking to each other in a nonverbal ballet that was almost impressive.
They were a good group and under normal circumstances I felt like we would have all hit it off, but there was a weird tension in the air that made my skin itch. Even Jack and Skip kept arguing over every little thing. I’d never seen Skip like that. Skip was quiet not argumentative. Jack would say the sky was blue and Skip counter with, only during the day. Ford and Suzie were too lost in each other to notice. It was up to me to keep the jokes coming if only to get a single smile from Roxy.
“I chucked a boomerang once. Not sure where it went but it’ll come back to me,” I said.
Skip groaned and shook his head. Probably not the first time he’d heard that one. Despite my best attempts, Roxy seemed to slip further into a dark mood.
To add to my mounting frustration, this biker at the bar kept looking at Roxy. He had a thick beard and a shaved head with a tattoo on his neck. He’d blatantly check out her legs, not even trying to hide it. I scooted closer to her and put my arm around the back of the chair. If he looked over here again, I would have to do something about it.
I caught Skip watching the exchange. He shook his head and mouthed, “Calm down.” I shrugged, and brushed my thumb across the exposed skin of her shoulder.
Roxy stood abruptly. “I’ll be right back.” Her words slurred.
