34
Julia
Bits and pieces come back to me.
Running.
Dirt.
Nathaniel. Above me. Protecting me.
Lincoln’s cut and scared face. Nathaniel holding my hand.
An ambulance.
Bright light in my eyes.
Nathaniel sleeping in a chair next to me.
Nathaniel. Always.
When I finally reconnect my body to my mind, I blink my eyes open. I’m in a hospital room. Nathaniel is still asleep in a chair next to me. I’m so tired. And thirsty. There’s a constant beeping. The green light of a machine is the only light in the dark room. I close my eyes and decide to try again after a little more sleep.
The next time I rouse to a bright light shining on my face. I blink my eyes open, turning to face the light shining through a window. The sun on my skin is soothing. I take a moment to focus on the streaks of warmth on my skin. It feels like a little “welcome back” and I smile.
The pain is there. I feel it all over my body, but it doesn’t bother me. I’m disconnected from it.
“Julia?”
I wonder how long I’ve been lying there, blinking in the light.
“Julia? Are you awake?” I manage to turn my head toward Nathaniel’s voice. He’s standing next to me, holding a hand with tubes taped to the back of it.
I can’t speak. My throat is really sore. I wonder if I’m sick. I send a little warmth into his hand.
He shudders out a breath and drops a kiss to my forehead.
“I was so worried. I love you so much,” he says.
I send one more little wave of warmth but the effort is too much and I’m pulled back under into the warm abyss of sleep.
The next time I wake from the darkness I’m far more aware of my body. There’s a sharp pain in my head and body but it is dulled in an unsettling way.
“Water?” I say before I open my eyes completely. It hurts to say even that.
A straw is gently put into my mouth and I take a few deep pulls. The coolness feels healing on my raw throat. I sigh and sit back.
After a minute I open my eyes again to Nathaniel. He looks better than the last time I was awake. He’s shaved and changed out of his rumpled and dusty clothes. His eyes are still bloodshot and concerned.
“Hi.” I smile, because despite being in so much pain, seeing him again is more than I ever dreamed possible.
“Hi,” he says back. His chin quivers.
“I love you too,” I say before I can fall asleep again.
“How are you feeling?” he asks, gently brushing hair out of my face. I wonder what I look like. I’m sore everywhere but the pain is not sharp, just an overall dull ache. “Do you need anything?”
“I want to sit up.”
