I sighed.
I hated every bloody feeling, but I hatednotfeeling anything more.
With a deep, shaking breath in, I unlocked my phone and pressed call.
My sponsor answered right away.
“Hi. I need help. I can’t do this alone,” I said with a shaking voice.
“You’re not alone,” he said.
A loud sob wracked me as the pain flowed out of me along with my tears.
40
FROM: [email protected]
SUBJECT: Home safe
Charlie,
It feels weird calling you that here and not RC.
Everything feels weird.
I’ve made it home safe. Sally reached out to me to try again to pitch the show. I declined. I just thought you should know.
I am worried about you. Please don’t let our last conversation lead you to do something you might regret.
Please call your sponsor if you need to. Please call me if you need to.
I’m still here. I’m still Kate.
I miss you.
Love,
Kate
41
Kate
“I honestly wasn’tsure you’d come back,” Gail said. “I figured you’d get one taste of the limelight and throw away this dusty old job.”
I snorted and reached into my desk. “Hardly.” I handed her the tiny snow globe I got her from the airport on the way home.
I had taken a whole week off before returning to work. A week to miss Charlie. To miss RC. To not really miss Pete at all. He hadn’t reached out since that last text. I didn’t think he was the one who leaked my identity to the press, he’s a bit too spineless for that. I did box up his stuff and ship it to him. I wasn’t going to risk a face-to-face if I could help it. Work was likely to be awkward enough.
Gail sat on the edge of my desk. “I gotta say, you do not seem happy. Is it because it’s hard to be back?”
“No, I’m fine.” I shook my head, frowning. “I’m sorry. I am happy to be back.”Not really at all.
She braced her hands on the desk. “Did something happen with the recording? I’ve been dying to hear all about it.”
“No. It was good. I think they got what they wanted.” I ground my jaw.
