37
Harrison
“Harrison?”Emma found me in a near catatonic state.
I wasn’t sure how long I’d been staring into space, mind racing, a thousand choices to make, yet the order to make them was a baffling puzzle that I was incapable of solving.
I needed to get to Frankie. Frankie was driving to Collette. Find Collette. Contact lawyers. No. First, call Frankie back.
“Harrison?”
“Emma?” Emma was here. Why was Emma here?
I stood up and threw myself into her arms. “I’m here. It’s going to be okay.” Her voice shook as she held me tightly.
I released her and tried to form coherent words. “I don’t know what to do. I-I don’t.” I scrubbed my hands over my face, wishing like hell I hadn’t quit smoking.
“Have you slept? Or eaten?”
I shook my head. “What time is it?”
“A little after nine.”
Hours. Frankie had been trying to get through to me for hours. With each of her voicemails I’d listened to, the more I spiraled out of control.
I tried to figure out how far that meant Frankie would be? Still in California? I had no idea. I just knew that the complete devastation I felt made my useless brain even more inept.
“How could I ever think I could take care of them? That’s my job, and I failed. Because I lost track of time. I lost my phone.” I scrubbed my hands through my hair, tugging until the pain distracted me from my breaking heart.
“That’s not true. Chad took it,” I said, remembering.
Why was Emma even here? She wasn’t meant to be here. I blinked at her, finally meeting her eyes.
“And I should have gotten it back. I just forgot. I was so into that bloody scene that I just forgot to get it back from Chad. And then I fell asleep. When I got it back, it was too late. I was too late.”
“It’s not too late. Listen—”
Chad walked into my trailer.
“You’re needed on set,” he said.
The pressure in my brain felt like it was about to crack in my skull.
“Chad, this isn’t a good time. There’s been a family emergency,” Emma said softly as she came to stand in front of me.
“Yeah. Right. Sure.” He sucked in his lips and looked around. “As there has been for almost a year. You took your time off, Harrison.” He looked around Emma, not even acknowledging her. “You’ve cost this movie enough. You have to get your shit together, man.”
I was still locked in place, debilitated by infinite options. “I just need—”
Chad lowered his voice and stepped closer. “Let someone else handle this. You don’t need to worry about it. This is why you have a team. Whatever it is, your people can handle it. Nobody else can replace you on that set, though.”
“I just—what if they need me?”
“You’re an actor, Harrison. What could they need from you?” I rubbed at my chest, knowing he wasn’t wrong. “Acting is what you’remeantto do,” Chad said. “Are you really the best person for this crisis anyway? Are you sure this is something you can handle?”
“Okay, that’s enough.” Emma’s cheeks burned bright red, spreading into her matching hair. “Harrison. Don’t listen to him. This place is work. It will be here, or it won’t. But you know Collette and Frankie need you. Don’t let him make you feel bad. You’re what they need.”
“I’m not enough,” I said, shaking my head. Frankie left without me.
