“What can I do?” I asked.
“Go big or go home. What’s something you never thought you’d ever do for her?” Janice asked.
“Aside from use Roundup on my garden?”
She tutted and swatted my arm. “Bigger.”
An idea percolated. Mari needed a big sign that I wasn’t going anywhere. I believed that she loved me as much as I loved her. It was time I left the safety of my house. And for once, it didn’t feel scary because nothing was scarier than the idea of Mari feeling alone and unloved.
“Oh, man. I have an idea, but I need your help. How do you feel about coming briefly out of retirement?” I asked.
“Lucky for you, I have consultant rates available.”
“Do you think you could call up the Bunco Broads? I need the power of those women.”
“Oh, they live for this sort of thing.” My mother grinned and rubbed her hands together.
CHAPTER 35
MARI
Who would have thought I’d be back to sitting alone in the teachers’ lounge eating a cold turkey sandwich? Well, I had. The autobiography of Mari Mitchell would be brief, depressing, and completely predictable.
It was the last day before spring break. I’d rushed through the day and had five minutes to eat before the final marching band rehearsal. The final rehearsal with Cath.
Pain threatened to swallow me whole.
No. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Giving up was not an option. Clara had been right. I always fight for what was right for my students. I wouldn’t give up yet. No matter what, I would be okay.
I would go on as I always had. I would find a way to get funding next year. I would track down every school board member and make sure Pin Dick alone wouldn’t have the power to cut the music program.
I may have put it all out there to Leo and gotten hurt, but I was still me.
I was ready to fight for my students. I would double my efforts next year. I would work harder and beg every person in Green Valley for donations, even if it meant going door-to-door.
I stood and looked around. I abandoned my pathetic food. I moved right, then froze and turned left. Then, I did it again. I was stuck with indecision, panic circling like a bird trapped in a house. Where to go first? What could I do?
I grabbed my bag and felt the weight of the gift for Leo in there. It was asmall gesture, but it would convey all my gratitude for him. He may have thought how we came together cheapened it somehow, but he deserved to feel loved regardless of what happened with us.
Leo.
Had I really fought for him as I did for all other things? Or had I let his own hurt be the reason I shut down?
Cath knocked on the doorframe of the teachers’ lounge.
“Hey, Cath,” I said.
“This place was a lot cooler in my imagination,” she said.
“Really? It looks exactly like every teachers’ lounge.”
“I guess I expected a dartboard with the faces of annoying students.”
“Oh, we keep that in the closet,” I teased.
She laughed with a roll of her eyes.
I was still standing in the middle of the room, thrumming with restless energy and not sure where to direct it.
