Was this maturity?
Janice had been in support of the surprise visit, and she’d even gone so far as ensuring that their neighbor, Pin Dick, who happened to be my principal, wouldn’t be home. But maybe it hadn’t been a rational choice.
Rational just meant nonconfrontational and letting things slide. The world was filled with people making excuses not to have a real conversation.
I was glancing at the line of Keurigs, debating if I could sneak a cup from Coach Easton’s machine without being noticed, when Clara slid into the chair next to me. “What’s up with the grumpy face?” She set down a Tupperware container of what looked like pasta carbonara, blowing the steam that rose from it.
Clara and I were cousins once removed or some such. Our grandfathers were brothers. We had played when we were little until she was suddenly gone from my life. It was good to have her back in town, and having her sub at the school was an unexpected but pleasant surprise. We reconnected with the familiarity of old friends. She was also the only person I had initially toldabout my family’s last-minute change of plans but I brushed it off as no big deal. With her big, complicated family, she didn’t have time for any more drama.
“I was thinking about the driving force of greed and the broken systems of the patriarchy behind it.” I sighed. My stomach growled loudly as I caught a whiff of cheesy bacon.
“How fun. No wonder.”
“That looks yummy.” I forced myself to look away from the pasta, my mouth filling with saliva. If I never ate another turkey sandwich again, it would be too soon.
“Leftovers from Sadie. I don’t do the cooking thing.”
“I feel that.” I gestured to my bag of chips and sad sammy. “Aw, Sadie. I haven’t seen your sister since we were kids. I think she was like twelve and I was jealous that she was getting boobs. How is she these days?”
“Great boobs.” Clara nodded, and I laughed. “Married. Happy. Just like the rest of the sisters,” Clara said with just a bit of edge. I wondered what that was about. “Except Gracie, obviously.”
“Look at us, two single babes living our best lives.” It almost sounded convincing. “Sadie lives next door, right?” I changed the subject before it got too morose.
“No, she moved but she’s still close enough to make edible food very convenient. I like where I live. I like sitting on the porch drinking my coffee and working in the yard.”
“And spying,” I added. She’d told me her tales ofRear Window-ing and often delighted me with the antics around her block.
“Speaking of. What was with the wake-up call this morning? Not that I don’t love our marching band. Go Black Bears.”
“Go Bears.” I told her about Janice’s request to help Cath, and Leo’s refusal to Devlin. “Maybe I had misdirected some of my frustration with my family...I’ve been accused of being reactive in the past. But it wasn’t like I lit a motorcycle on fire.”
“I see nothing wrong with your actions. A literal wake-up call. Here, you can have some.” She shoved the dish toward me. “If I hear your stomach growl one more time, I’ll shove a candy bar down your throat.”
“Thanks.” I took a giant bite, not even pretending to turn down the offer like a polite Southern lady. “And, right?” My response sounded muffled around my mouthful. I swallowed with a wince, a piece of bacon scraping my throat. “What else is Leo going to do?”
“Listen. I’ve seen that man, and I can honestly say something shady is happening at that house. He’s what, our age? Thirtysomething?”
“I think he was three grades behind us.”
“Oh yeah. Leonard. He was so weird and shy. And so painfully quiet. That kid Vander, who he was always with, did all the talking for both of them. ”
“Shy?” Devlin had made it seem like Leo was arrogant. Weren’t all drummers just a little too full of themselves? Distracted at best. “I don’t really remember him from back in the day. He was just my teacher’s kid.”
“He was an odd duck. He’s all grown up now, though, isn’t he?”
I avoided her question because my brain was all too quick to replay the interaction and his strong shoulders.
“Still. No man is that concerned with gardening.”
I shrugged. “Not my business. I just don’t want Cath to suffer because he’s a snob. But now I’m thinking bringing the marching band to his mom’s house was a bit reactive. I was just so mad. And maybe I misdirected some of those feelings.”
“Are you upset about your parents bailing?”
“I have unresolved feelings...I guess. Possibly.” I sat back with a sigh.
“You really need to come to spaghetti night.”
“I will.” Even as I said it, I wasn’t sure that I would. I wantedmyimmediate family to want to spend time with me. I didn’t want to have to foist myself upon extended quasi-relatives. I felt so pathetic.
