Anything for a good cause.
“Are you going to sit on the charity committee? I think that Madi is organizing it again this year.”
“Meh. I just like to show up and look pretty.” I was looking for something to fill my days, but nothing about that sounded fun. Planning. Meetings. Spreadsheets. I was more of a figure-it-out-on-the-go, never-sit-still kind of guy.
“You seem ... restless. Ruth said you’ve been hovering,” he said.
“I was just offering to help her,” I said.
Ruth Hickey runs the local B and B. I often help her and Betsy Wainwright, who owns the General Store. They are both in the group of busybody grandmas that I saw on my run this morning.
“This is how you act if you need a project,” Levi said.
“Yeah. Maybe.”
It occurred to me that was exactly what I needed. Some of the tension relaxed out of my shoulders. I was surprised by his line of questioning. Maybe he wasn’t gearing up for Real Talk.
Regardless, it was time to crack a joke. I flexed my pecs in an alternating pattern under the tight blue Cozy Creek Fire Brigade shirt I now sported.
He blinked at me, unimpressed. “Aren’t you off today?” he asked, implying, quite unnecessarily, that I didn’t need to be in my work tee. But half of what I owned was CCFB gear.
“Yeah, but I gotta represent.”
“Let the tourists know you’re the hot local firefighter,” he said.
I shrugged. “Hey, I’m just here to let the big-city ladies know that I am available to fulfill their small-town holiday movie fantasies.”
“Sans the happy ever after.”
“Right. Sans that.” I cleared my throat and looked around for an excuse to leave.
I’d been wanting to hang with Levi all morning, but now that I was the victim of his penetrating stare, I couldn’t wait to bolt. “Things work better when they leave at the end of the weekend,” I added unnecessarily.
He narrowed his eyes, and I thought maybe I’d laid on the playboy thing a little too thick. Truth be told, I didn’t dabble with the locals or the tourists. Sure, I loved to flaunt this gift of a body and didn’t hate the compliments and swoons. Okay, I lived for them, but I didn’t want to get wrapped up in anything. There were too many people who I cared about disappointing if things didn’t work out. Better to play the part of the perpetual bachelor card in the eyes of the town.
“You’re so full of shit. Even more so lately than normal,” Levi said.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“Pace.” It was like Lily Carmichael had been transported through him in that moment, and I had no choice but to meet his dark stare. I was sixteen again and high as hell, caught red-handed eating her just-baked cookies, absolutely convinced she could tell I’d smoked.
“What?” I asked with a similar nonchalant innocence.
Levi ran a hand over his hair and let out a breath. “Are you sure you’re doing okay? You have this ...” He held out his hands like he was holding off a bear attack, fingers spread and jerky. “This intense energy lately. And look, not to be a dick, but you seem to be tired or something. Are you sleeping?”
I scoffed. “I’m in peak health,” I said defensively. “Doc just told me.”
Truth be told, I hadn’t been sleeping too great. But so long as I kept busy and worked out a few hours a day, I could finally collapse into bed from sheer exhaustion.
“I think you’re right about me needing a project.” If I just had somewhere to put my energy, I wouldn’t have to think.
“Okay. I need to say something,” Levi said in a rush.
The tension was immediately back in my shoulders. I rubbed at that spot on my chest that had been bothering me.
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you for a while. I owe you an apology,” he said.
I couldn’t have this conversation right now.
