“You know, that sounds like a good idea,” he said.
“Well. I am a pro.” We shared a long smile.
As proud as I was of Pace, I was fully sad to see the night end. What a waste of an everything shower and a full face of makeup.
I squeezed his shoulder. “Take two quarts of Ben and Jerry’s and call me in the morning.”
His hand snatched my hand before I could pull it all the way back. “You can’t go,” he said, suddenly sounding worried. I looked to where he held me. My heart pounded hard, my silly mood slipping off into something more serious, but I didn’t want to misinterpret his meaning.
“Don’t you want to be alone? That’s a very common side effect.” I kept my voice light despite the anticipation that was currently taking my breath away.
“No. I don’t want you to go.” He shook his head as if to say no more of this game. “I just don’t want to go out there and be ...” He trailed off, seemingly unable to find the right words. His lifted arm gestured to the Outside World.
“On?” I supplied.
His brows lifted in surprise. “Yeah. Exactly. It’s not that I feel like I’m acting . . .”
“But being around people is atypeof acting,” I jumped in. “It’s not the same as lounging around, burping with freedom.”
“Huh. I guess I do act differently in front of people. Only because I feel like they expect it.”
“Totally. Don’t we all do it to some extent? Or at least feel pressure to. As you said, it’s part of the cost of admission for community. But everyone’s allowed a night off. Even you,” I said.
“So you’ll stay?” he asked, his puppy dog hopefulness making a no impossible. Even if I had wanted to leave.
“Only if you’re sure you want company. Honestly? I’m just so proud of you for taking the night off that I won’t be offended if you want to be alone.” There was another part of me that worried the rumor mill was churning after the scene I’d made at the fire. Was that why he didn’t want to go out? I was the first person that he’d been linked with since Kaylee. Maybe he wasn’t ready to field questions about “us,” whatever that might mean.
“I want you. To stay. If that’s allowed for the cure,” he said. Tension released from my shoulders.
“Oh, yeah, one to two people is okay. So long as you don’t have to try around me.”
“Nah. I feel more comfortable with you than I feel alone.” He rubbed at his chest again. “You don’t mind hanging out here, doing boring things? Even if we aren’t checking things off your list?”
“Are you kidding me? This is what I live for!” I brought my excitement levels back down when I realized I’d shouted. “I thought you’d never ask. We’ve been playing to your strengths before, but now it’s my time to shine.”
His smile was so wide and real that it was almost as though I was seeing it for the first time. The power of his relief was tangible. It about knocked me off my feet.
“Okay. Great. Where do we start?” he asked.
I looked between us. “First things first. We have got to get out of these jeans.”
His eyebrows shot up, and he immediately started to unbutton his. “Back in my wheelhouse.”
“No!” I held up my hands, trying to explain through my laughter. “We need comfy loungewear.”
“I don’t have?—”
“Pj’s, Pace. Loungewear is a socially acceptable way of wearing pajamas out and about.”
“Ah,” he said with understanding. “Coming right up.” He raced out of the room with more excitement than I’d seen since I arrived.
I went to the kitchen to see whatsnackagewe were working with.
Not thirty minutes later,we were sufficiently comfy-fied and sitting on the couch (opposite sides, sadly), trying to decide what to watch.
My jaw had dropped when Pace came back out of his bedroom and handed me an extra pair of flannel bottoms. I hadn’t thought Pace owned anything sluttier than his running shorts until he came out in low-slung gray sweatpants and a soft, well-worn band T-shirt.
I did my best not to stare.
