My best was not enough.
“You pick the movie since it’s your comfort night,” I said, forcing myself to focus on the TV, so I wouldn’t continue to seek out outlines in the material of his sweats.
“What about that new indie flick from Harrison Evans? I heard it’s good,” he said.
“I love him. I’d like to meet him. Or any of the actors fromTerraformative.”
Pace nodded his agreement as he searched for the movie.
“Oh, man. It’s on a streaming service I don’t have.” He frowned. “I usually watch stuff at the firehouse to kill time, so I don’t subscribe to anything here.”
“Remember the simpler times when we just had one company overcharging us? And now we have several.”
“Ah, back in the old days.”
“Too bad. I have it at home,” I said, putting Milk Duds and a handful of popcorn in my mouth.
“Let me use your log in,” he said.
I needed a minute to suppress my astonishment at his audacity. And, also, to chew and swallow without choking. It took a minute.
“Sir. That is a crime.” I pressed my hand to my chest, pretending to be appalled. “And you are a fireman, an exemplar of the perfect citizen.”
“Don’t you have that on the list?” He leaned closer to lower his voice as though somebody might hear.
“I don’t remember anything about stealing streaming services on there.”
“‘Break a minor law, one where nobody gets hurt,’” he quoted. Verbatim.
I blinked and felt my cheeks heat. For two people whose entire relationship was based on that list, it hadn’t come up that much recently. Especially not the exact verbiage. It made me all tingly to hear him recite it perfectly.
“Wow. It almost sounds like you had that memorized,” I said.
“I do. The whole list. Even the bits you struck out.” He gave me a cheeky little look. Cheekier than his running shorts.
“We don’t need to talk about that.” I looked straight ahead, fully aware of the blush spreading up my neck. “But fine. Eventhough this is just below marriage in the list of commitments people make to each other, sure, you can have my log in.”
After the ten-minute process of trying to use the remote to log in, we were finally situated.
It was long dark outside now. Somewhere, the town of Cozy Creek was playing with their massive gourds, but here Pace and I sat, each occupying an opposite end of the couch.
What would he do if I made an excuse to go cuddle up next to him? What would happen if I leaned into him for warmth? He could put his arm around me and then maybe lean over to kiss up along the column of my neck.
I shivered with my whole body.
Who was I? Thinking so boldly, not imagining the worst-case scenario.
Pace got up and grabbed a blanket that was folded on a small bench next to the TV. I thought he’d been about to hand it to me. Instead, after moving the food from the sofa, he flung it out and sat down next to me, spreading it over both our laps and sitting close enough that his entire side was flat next to mine. We were close enough that I felt the brush of his thigh when he moved, and the heat sent electricity through me.
My heart began to thump wildly.
We shared the same air molecules. There were tiny bits of fabric separating his skin from mine and nothing else.
We were . . .snuggling.
Did he realize that every time he took a deep breath, the action caused the hairs on his arm to brush me? Could he possibly know just how aware of every movement and breath of his I was?
I had no idea what happened in the movie. I didn’t even care to retrieve the snacks. My mind was fixated on his every breath and shift.
