“Right,” I say quickly, too quickly. “Exploding dishes, that kind of stuff, you know?”
“It's handled now,” Ryan adds, nodding way too much.
Noah stares for a beat longer, then shrugs. “Okay…”
Ryan takes that as his cue. “Anyway, I should go. G’night, man.”
He gives Noah a pat on the shoulder as he passes,notmaking eye contact.
“Later,” Noah says, half confused.
Ryan grabs his jacket off the chair, holding it in his hand as he takes a few more steps. His eyes flick to mine for a second as he reaches the door. A quick smile tugs at his mouth. And then he’s gone and the door shuts behind him.
Noah turns to me slowly. “He’s acting weird.”
I force a laugh. “Yeah, I guess. Long day.”
He eyes me for a second, like he wants to ask more, but then just shrugs it off. “Whatever. Dad’s gonna be home a little later by the way.”
I nod, trying to smile like I look normal.
“I’m gonna take a shower.” He steps away, only to immediately yelp and stumble. “Shit—why is the floor soaked?”
I look at the puddle of water near the sink and bite back a nervous laugh. “Oh uhm—must’ve spilled some water with the dishes.”
Noah laughs as he heads up the stairs. “Try not to flood the house, Mads.”
I huff out a laugh, but it comes out way too hard.
And just like that, he disappears upstairs. The second he’s gone, I exhale. Hard. Then I lean both hands against the kitchen counter, staring at the floor.
What theholy helljust happened?
35
MADDY
Kissing my fake boyfriend might not have been my best idea
It’s 7 a.m. My body feels fully awake. Even though I didn’t really sleep. Maybe a few minutes at a time, but nothing that felt useful. Every time I started to drift off, my brain pulled me right back to the kiss. And even the factthatwe kissed. Not a “haha fake-dating bit” kiss. Not a “public performance” kiss. A real one. A very real one.
It keeps replaying in my head whether I want it to or not. Every time I remember it, my stomach flips in this stupid, nervous way that makes it very hard to not think about it. Because that was thebestkiss I’ve ever fucking had.
I didn't even know where I was, what time it was, and probably not even what my name was, dammit. I’ve never had a kiss make me feel like that before.
I realize I’m smiling.
Uuggghhhh.
And now what? We didn't really manage to talk about it, because Noah had to have the absolute worst timing to come home. (And I thought I was bad with time.)
I wonder if Ryan is still sleeping. Did he sleep better than I did? Is he replaying it in his head? Is he even thinking about it? What the hellishe thinking? What if he’s not thinking about it at all? What if he regrets it?
Jesus—I need to get out of bed and move to stop these thoughts.
I shove the blankets off and sit up. I force myself out of bed, pull on sweatpants and the first T-shirt I see, and tie my hair up without looking in the mirror.
Down the stairs, I mutter to myself like a crazy person.
