Her eyes close. “I don’t. But…for all the right reasons.”
Ah…frick.
“You want that?” I ask, voice pained.
Equally agonized, she whispers, “Too fast.”
Too fast. Yes. So fast. We’re going to get married. We are going to getmarried. Maybe we should wait, until then, just to make sure it feels permanent. Forever. I need having her to feel likeforever. I don’t think I’ll survive anything less. I’m still so scared that I won’t be worthy of drowning. After all, she hasn’t said that she loves me yet. I need to be patient. I need toslow down.
I release her throat, kiss her chin. “What can I do for you right now?”
Biting a weak smile, she watches me as more tears brim, then she shakes her head. “Keep loving me. Just like this. You’re teaching me what love is.” She sniffles, and oceans fall from her sky blue eyes. “My opinion matters to you. Respecting me matters to you. I don’t have to fight with you to be heard. I don’t have to fear being seen and judged.Thank you.”
Thank you. For being bare minimum.
I need to spoil her better, so she’ll know when it’s really appropriate to thank me for anything.
Wiping her tears, I kiss the corners of her eyes. “Can you do something for me?”
“Anything, King.”
That makes me shudder with ecstasy. “Later, when you’re journaling, can you write that I love you in your rainbow? If anything is ever hard, can you thinkbut Lukas loves meand make that mean everything to you?”
Her arms close around my neck, and she whispers in my ear, “Don’t be silly, Lukas…it already means everything to me.”
My heart skips, and I wrap her up, holding her until we’ve lost all track of time.
