“Why did you leave?” It sounds plaintive, and he looks lost.
I swallow the lump in my throat.
“There was so much I didn’t know, right?” His forehead is crinkled, and I can tell he’s struggling not to cry. “I didn’t know you were pregnant, I didn’t know Daniel was giving you trouble?—”
“I…I shouldn’t have said anything about Daniel.” I rub my arm, antsy, and look around the diner and outside again.
“Who are you looking for? Why are you acting like this? What happened? Are you afraid of Daniel?” He leans in.
“I can’t talk about Daniel.”
“Why not?”
“He—” I shake my head.
“Lola. You’re freaking me out right now. Should I call Daniel right now and have him tell me what happened between the two of you?”
I reach out and grab his hand. “No!”
He looks down at my hand and puts his other hand on top. “You’re shaking.” His eyes are blazing when he looks at me. “What did he do to you, Lola?”
I close my eyes and drop my head, unable to stop the tears from pouring out. This was the worst idea, all of it. I should’ve known I couldn’t be around Tully even one more time without spilling my guts. I just had an uncontrollable urge to see him. I’d been unsure about what I was going to say to him tonight, but I was not planning on telling him everything. I’m about to ruin us. Again.
I look up at him. “If I tell you things…you have to go on as normal with Daniel. You can’t change anything or act like you know?—”
“I can’t promise that. Just please…” he says.
“Daniel knew about the baby. He caught me at the store the night I bought the test.”
His jaw clenches. “Didheconvince you to leave?”
I move my hand out from under his and wipe my nose with a napkin. “I didn’t know we’d see Daniel tonight and that you would pick up on the tension between us,” I whisper.
“I deserve to know the truth. You tore me open, Lola.” The confession slips out, raw. “I didn’t know how to breathe without you for a long time.”
I can barely see through my tears. “I know. Because neither did I. And I’m so sorry I did that to you.”
His eyes drill into mine, his body on alert like he’s bracing himself.
“So how does Daniel play into all of this?” he asks. “Because I don’t understand how myagentcould talk you into leaving me. Not when you claimed to have loved me so much.”
A group of teenagers comes in, talking loudly, and one of them recognizes Tully.
“Awesome game tonight, man,” the kid says.
“Thanks. Nice to have a Fierce fan in New York,” Tully says, forcing a smile.
When the group goes to their table, Tully waits for me to respond about Daniel.
“None of it sounds reasonable now. What I did was unforgivable,” I finally say.
“Let me be the judge of that,” he bites out.
“It was complicated,” I say. “Things were going on at home. My dad was gambling like crazy. I didn’t even know he had a gambling problem, but he was an addict. My mom kicked him out, and Dad thought they were going to lose the house. Daniel started showing up at work. He was even waiting for me after class one day.”
“How did I miss this? Why would he do that?”
“He knew when you were in class or at practice, and he made sure to confront me when no one else was around, so no one could corroborate my story.”
