I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had one of those kisses.
“What just happened?” I asked when he moved back slightly, eyeing the screen where two commentators were also discussing what had just happened, though they were focused on the field and not Penn, like I was.
“I accelerated the timeline. It’s pointless waiting and watching. Buck got me thinking today; Icando something. I need to get this club fixed now, and it’s not going to happen as long as that moron is in charge.”
“Which moron?”
He nodded to where the camera had zoomed in on a man dressed in a Lion’s tracksuit and ballcap. “Trenton Furst. He’s the soon to be ex-General Manager, he’s been making a series of terrible decisions which have had a negative effect on the club and the team. He fired the coach earlier this season and hasn’t replaced him, the morale is low and it needs a boost. It needs direction.”
“Which you’re going to give it?”
“Correct.” He reached for the remote and increased the volume to listen to what the commentators were saying but itwas too late. The high-pitched accordion tune rung out through the stadium as the game got underway again. Penn smacked his lips to mine, rearranged us so my legs were tucked over his lap, kissed me one more time, then turned back to the screen.
The snuggling didn’t last long.
Within minutes, he’d jumped up twice as one of the umpires had made a decision he didn’t agree with. He was now back on the sofa, his body hunched forwards and his elbows on his knees while his hands twisted together. Seeing him like that, the deepest sense of déjà vu overwhelmed me; from a period in time I’d not thought about in years.
“You’re so like your dad.”
Penn’s eyes shot around to mine, studying the sincerity in my expression. “Really?”
“Yes, absolutely,” I nodded, and Penn’s eyes immediately brimmed with tears. “Did Lauren ever tell you about the time we snuck down to get midnight snacks at, like, eight thirty?”
He laughed, shaking his head with a sniff.
“Your mom had already said we couldn’t have any snacks, but she went out for dinner so we tried anyway. You were down with your dad watching The Yankees in the den off the kitchen. He was yelling at the T.V., just like you are now. Neither of you even noticed us take, I dunno, maybe four tubs of ice cream out of the freezer and sneak them up to Lauren’s room. Then we tried again the following weekend, and we realized every single time there was an away game we’d be able to do it. Laurie stopped asking your mom because she always said no, and we knew we could get it anyway. And even if she didn’t leave the house, your mom never hung out in the kitchen when you were both down there.”
Penn wiped away the last of his unshed tears. “No, she always escaped off somewhere. She hated the hollering.”
“She did.” I looked at him, the tears replaced by a small smile that I’d placed on his lips. “Then your dad left us snacks out after you guys had gone to bed, so then we got two feasts. Anyway, you’re so like him. You’re sitting here now, exactly how he used to sit, all riled up. And you’d sit there too, a smaller version of you anyway. He would be so,soproud of you, Penn.”
He broke eye contact for a split second to pick up the remote and mute the game. Then in a seamless, commanding movement just like this morning, he hitched me up with one arm as though I weighed nothing more than a feather and straddled me across his lap. Reaching up, he pulled my hair free of the band, running his fingers through the strands until he could loop it round his fingers.
“I keep wondering if this is all his doing,” he muttered.
“The Lions?”
“Yes.” His eyes filled with heat, the flecks of dark grey which scattered round the edge of each iris sparkled in the dim light. “And you.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you.”
He started to say something else, but I stopped him with words that had been revolving around and around in my head as I attempted to reconcile what was going on.
“You’ve only ever been Lauren’s brother to me, but these past few days… I dunno, something happened…” I stopped before I made a bigger fool of myself. I really should have practiced out loud. If I had, I would have realized how totally idiotic and ineloquent I sounded.
But his smile never faltered. “I know, I feel it too. But I’d rather not think about my sister while I’m kissing you.”
A smile twitched at the corner of my lips. Leaning down, I took his mouth with mine, not wanting to think any more about what we were doing. I only wanted to feel. Feel the heat of himunder me, how well we fitted together, feel how my heart beat in sync with his as my chest pressed flush against him. This time, I wanted the kiss to go exactly where it needed.
I had no interest in it being short.
Our tongues glided together leisurely, relaxed, tenderly, slowly enough to spike my blood with so much desire I was becoming lightheaded. The volume of the baseball commentary had been replaced with electricity which crackled through the air as his hands pushed under my sweater; then the chubby pads of his palms stilled on my ribcage.
He eased away from me, looking up through thick lashes and tilted his head. “I meant what I said, just being here with you is enough for me.”
His thumb was dusting back and forth, millimeters away from the underside of my breast,justout of reach. It was hard to concentrate on anything but what his thumb was doing, where it was, where itwasn’t… where I wanted it. I knew my blood was careening around my body, I could hear it whooshing through my ears; I could feel it under the surface of my skin. I could feel it between my legs, at the apex of my thighs.
