I thought back to that weekend. It was true, we were better. I hadn’t realized how nervous I’d been about her seeing my family again, but she’d loved it as much as they had. She’d seen my mom a couple of times while my parents had been in town, and met up with Emerson and the kids. We were connecting on every level; laughing until we cried, and reminiscing about high school while she massaged my shoulders after a long game. And the sex? It was better than I’d ever imagined; the best I’d ever had.
It was almost as though we’d never been apart.
Almost.
Because she still hadn’t called me her boyfriend, and occasionally I’d catch her hesitating, tensing, faltering; like she was about to say something and then decide against it.
And not that I was counting, but she still hadn’t told me she loved me, no matter how many times I told her.
Okay, I was counting.
“But it’s good?” he pressed on.
I nodded slowly. “Yeah, it is. I think it’s taking Marnie a little longer to get used to it.” I thought back to her comment earlier. “Maybe getting used to me being me as well.”
“That’s understandable though. You’re a much bigger dick now than you were in high school, I’d imagine,” he grinned.
“You’re lucky it would be frowned upon to reach across and slap you,” I rolled my eyes, “but seriously, it’s good between us. I just feel she’s holding back sometimes.” I shrugged. “I dunno. I love her, and I want everyone to know it.”
Drew rolled the stem of his wine glass, spinning the dark red liquid. “I’m sure it’ll feel like that for a while. When Emerson and I found each other again, it took us a few months to really figure shit out.”
“Yeah, I hope that’s all it is.” I glanced over to the waiter as he appeared with the check but handed my credit card over before he could place it down, along with my valet ticket. “Thanks, man. Can you get my car brought around the back?”
“Certainly, sir.”
Drew peered around me. “The girls are coming. You want to come back with us for a nightcap?”
“Raincheck?” I shook my head. “I want to get Marnie home. We’re flying out tomorrow night. Thanks for coming out tonight though, dude. We can do this more now I’m not third wheel.”
He nodded enthusiastically. “Anytime. It’s good to get away from the kids too, if only to sleep past six a.m. I will never get used to being awake at that time.”
“Tell me about it,” I shuddered. I was looking forward to a long lie in tomorrow.
We both stood as the girls returned. “Can we call the driver?”
“Already done.” I looked at Emerson, who was now wrapped around Drew. “Want us to give you a ride?”
She shook her head. “No thanks, we’re going to walk a little.”
It took five minutes of hugging and organizing when we’d see them next for the car to pull up, then another fifteen to get back to Marnie’s apartment, where I pulled her onto the couch and planned to spend the next hour snuggling while the highlightsplayed. According to the sleep schedule she had everyone on, I also had another hour after that to get lucky before it was lights out.
I caught her hand as she pushed it through my hair, and pulled her down into my arms.
“Thank you for dinner tonight, it was perfect.” She kissed my cheek, moving her legs to rest on mine, and I was only slightly disappointed she’d changed out of her dress.
Maybe if I asked nicely I could convince her to put the first one on again, even if it was ruined.
“You’re welcome.” I ran my palms up and down her legs while I flipped through the games played tonight. “I’m sorry about your other dress; I’ll buy you a new one. But you still looked so beautiful tonight, Marn. So fucking beautiful. I couldn’t keep my eyes off you.”
“It was totally worth it.” Her fingers were twisting the ends of my hair, which was almost long enough for her to wrap around her index finger now.
My eyes flicked from the Mariners game to her. “Happy fake early Birthday, my little Star. I love you.”
“Thank you. It was the best fake birthday I could have asked for,” she grinned, and slightly drunkenly scooched onto my lap. Her arms slid around my neck; her lips trailed a path along my jaw until they found home on my own. My dick got hard the second she’d flung her legs on mine, but now her hot little body was pressed against me it was throbbing. “Now, please stop talking and kiss me.”
My lips were a hairs breadth away from brushing hers when a flicker went off in the far,farrecesses of my brain.
When I think back, I don’t know what possessed me to do it, but I didn’t kiss her. Instead, perhaps stupidly, I pulled away. I wanted to hear it. “Marnie, I love you.”
