Gwen; Holding.
And there I was, walking down the street, grinning at my phone like a little girl.
What the hell was this?
It was no secret that I adored Sebastian. We were friends. Great friends.
But we’d met the day I got here. I’d literally run here in the middle of the night from my husband with a garbage bag of belongings.
Of course I’d noticed how beautiful the green in his hazel eyes were. I’d smiled at the way he wiggled his brows when he spoke, and each time our fingers brushed, chills swept over my skin. Sometimes I caught myself staring at him a moment too long and had to yank my gaze away.
Because he wasn’t interested. Why would he be? He was normal. Stable. He had a career, and a home, and a family.
I worked in a café and lived in a domestic violence shelter.
Why would he be interested inme?
No, this wasn’t a date. I needed to wrangle in those butterflies, because he hadn’t asked me on a date. He’d offered to take me to dinner as payment for teaching his niece piano.
That was all.
My phone dinged again.
Sebastian;Wasted’s heavier lyrically. Cocaine Jesus is catchier.
Gwen; Wasted’s one of my favorites. Try Painkillers(:
I could hear his snarky, blunt voice in the next text.
Sebastian;Every title involves drug use, Gwen.
Gwen; They’re not about drug use, Sebastian. It’s metaphoric.
He followed up with an eye roll emoji.
The rec center was only a few strides ahead now. I stowed the phone into my pocket, tugged down my balaclava, and did my best to ignore those flapping butterfly wings.
I’d never beento therapy before coming to the ranch. Movies always made it look cold and depressing. I wanted to move on from my trauma. Not dwell in it.
But therapy sessions here felt more like a sleepover. A few dozen girls sat around on couches, under fuzzy throws, with steaming mugs of tea or hot cocoa in hand. The pine trees covered in snow out the window added a level of coziness, rather than cold. And the spread of snacks always got me giddy.
After snatching a couple cookies off the table by the door, I sat in my usual spot on the floral sofa. Legs crossed lotus style, I smiled and said hello to everyone who walked in. All the faces were familiar at this point.
A couple thousand of us lived here on the ranch. I didn’t know each and every name or story, but I could pick out any of these faces from a crowd.
Except for one. She walked in at five ‘til 7, only minutes before group started, wearing a pair of baggy sweatpants and a bleach-stained hoodie. I recognized the look, even if not the person wearing it.
Her blonde hair was grown out, brown roots exposed. She wore a bit of makeup, but not enough to mask the dark circle, or the swelling, around her left eye.
Her round cheeks told me she couldn’t have been older than twenty.
She stopped at the entrance a moment longer, looking around the room. Most of the other girls gossiped amongst themselves, not realizing she was here. I waved at her, getting her attention.
“You can sit wherever. There’s room here if you want.” Smiling, I scooched over. Usually Simone sat there, but she wasn’t here yet and I know she’d appreciate me making space for the newcomer. “If you’re hungry, grab something to eat, something to drink. Just make yourself at home.”
She forced a tight-lipped smile, nodding.
Probably as uncomfortable as I had been my first day here.
