Chapter One
Riley
“Explain this to me again,” Torin says. “So first, you have to sacrifice three adult males. And then you have to chant what again?”
I glance over at him. “‘Please don’t eat my testicles!’ The last person to shout it loses their testicles.”
“What if they don’t have testicles?”
“Then if theywanttesticles, they can fight over the ones that are sacrificed,” I explain.
Torin slowly nods as he stares up at the behemoth. “And tell me again, what is the purpose of this?”
“It’s a human ritual. A requirement, actually. This is how we humans are reminded that death could happen at any second, so we’d better appreciate every moment of life.”
“So you risk your life to appreciate your life?” Torin asks, sounding uncertain that he’s understanding this correctly, but honestly, he’s doing a fantastic job of it.
“Exactly.”
“And we wait in line for this because?”
“It’s like a coming-of-age ceremony. You have to be this tall and your body can’t be this broken,” I say as I point to the sign which declares that anyone with any ailment should not ride.
Torin scrutinizes it. “And… where does this hell ride end?”
“Right back here.”
“So you… willingly get on this thing… not to go anywhere, but to arrive right back here?”
“Well, you go through many stages. Grief, terror, horror, contemplating life, and then the thrill that you’re still alive at the end. Ooh, look, we’re up next,” I say, pushing him toward the roller coaster.
Mickey, who suggested coming to the theme park, nods. “I approve, Riley.”
“Thank you,” I say as I lead Torin, the god who fell into my life, onto the roller coaster, which I feel like is an appropriate activity to toss a god onto.
He’s a handsome man who is tall enough that he struggles to get into the seat. It’s definitely not made for people who are about six foot seven… oh, and people who are also contemplating their life choices. He sits down between me and Mickey, our necromancer friend who is along for the ride. And because Mickey is pushing five foot four, he looks even shorter when placed next to Torin. But while Torin seems mildly concerned, Mickey appears absolutely relaxed. He even closes his eyes as the wind blows his curly hair into his face.
After last week’s events, all three of us need a bit of a break. Not only did we find out that a god was using the four horsemen of the apocalypse to destroy four realms for some reason we’re still not quite sure of, but I was also informed that I’m the reincarnation of the horseman “Death.”
How delightful.
Really, I just want to romp around with my new sex god and continue to play the game of “are we dating, are we not?”while the god learns what it means to be in a relationship after a thousand years of spreading his love and spreading legs.
But instead, I got smacked with the title of Death, told that the reason my body is falling apart is likely because I’ve been separated from my horse—which I do not want—and handed the realization that Torin and I might be the only two who can stop this god from destroying any more realms.
And to top it all off, the horseman who I reincarnated from is the same one who destroyed Torin’s world and was the reason all of his people died. Oh, and Torin also killed him (or is it me?) which is (somehow) the least of our worries.
It’s been a lot.
Like…a lot.
Not only that, but the souls of those who’d been affected by the horseman Conquest appear to be enamored with me, which is why the white orbs are currently floating around me and confusing the ride security. We got a lot of looks when we arrived at the theme park, but I really couldn’t tell whether it was the god of war and love, the souls bounding after me like a herd of puppies who don’t want to get left behind, or the necromancer—Mickey—who was being carried by two undead because the “Walk from the parking lot was just too far and they hadn’t fetched the wagon yet.”
Like I said… it’s been a lot.
And instead of facingany of it,we decided to go to a theme park. As long as Lt. Lindsey, my boss, doesn’t find out, it’ll be fine.
“Pull this down,” I say as I grab the over-shoulder restraints and pull mine down to show him what to do. Kit hops off to wait for us to return since there is no real way to strap her down, but I really don’t think she minds. She seems as thrilled about the idea of riding the roller coaster as Torin is, and I can’t help but noticethe way Torin has locked eyes with her, like he’s jealous she gets to stay behind.
