I just shake my head, stroking her soft jaw with my thumb. “There’s no escaping these monsters. Can’t you see that? Look what they do to those who defy them. They’ve made me into a monster, turned me into a man Ihate.”
Maisie cuts me off. “You said they threatened me last night. What does that mean? I can’t help you if I don’t understand.”
I’m not sure how much I want to let Maisie into this, but it’s clear I have to give her something.
“I owe a debt to some bad people. I’m working through it, but they don’t always play fair. I’ve been uncompliant recently, and they didn’t like that. They have pictures of…of us kissing in the rain. They wanted me to know they have eyes everywhere. I can’t escape them, no matter where I go.” I grip her face, letting her see the scared man I am and how serious this is. “Don’t you see now why I couldn’t let you get close to me? I didn’t want you wrapped up in my mess, and that all went to shit because I can’t resist your fucking kissable lips and your golden heart.”
A single tear escapes Maisie's eye, and I scoop it up with my thumb. “That little red bandana you love to use in the barn, they tied it to my door handle with barbed wire last night. Fuckingbarbed wire! It was a warning, a threat against your life. It was the last straw to tip me over, and I went feral last night because of it.”
Her lip wobbles, but she stays strong for me. Her hand reaches out hesitantly, stroking my busted lip. I close my eyes, leaning into her touch. “Did they do this to you? Do they, do they beat you?” Her voice breaks on the last word, and when I blink my eyes back open, her shiny, tear-filled ones find mine.
“No, honey, they didn’t do this,” I assure her.
“Then who?” Her voice is firm now, a burning rage underlining her tone. “Who hurt you, Gray?”
I sigh, thinking over what to tell her. I can’t bear the weight of her disappointment when she finds out I fight people, kill people with my bare hands. Not today, not yet. I want to keep the innocent look in her eyes when she looks at me for a little bit longer. Call me selfish.
“I do assignments for them,” I lie through my teeth. “Sometimes, I get hurt while doing them.” It’s not a full on lie. I am assigned to matches, and I do sometimes get hurt. Sometimes, they make me fight young kids from within the mafia to teach them lessons. Those ones hurt the worst. Those times, I come out unscathed. All except my heart.
Her face pinches at my words, but she lets my lie sit between us for now. I’ve fed her enough to let her into my mess of a life. I can tell she knows there’s more, but she leaves it for now.
“We can find the money and pay them back. I can?—”
I shush her with my finger on her lip. “No, we can’t. It’s more complicated than that.”
“Then uncomplicate it for me,” she yells, her anger boiling over.
My lips thin in a pained smile. “I wish I could, honey. I’m…I’m working on it, but it’s going to take some time. In the meantime, I need to lay low and do as they say so no one gets hurt. Soyoudon’t get hurt.”
I grip her face in both my palms, bringing our foreheadstogether. “I promise you, I will do everything in my power to fix this and keep you safe. I, well, I fucking care about you, Maisie. You’ve engraved yourself right down to my very heart, and I don’t think I’m strong enough to walk away from you anymore. But we have to be careful for now. We can’t be normal. I can’t court you the way I would like to or show you off around town like you deserve.”
I let my hands drop, rolling on my back and taking Maisie with me. “Fuck, I’m getting ahead of myself. I don’t even know what this is between us, or if you’re even interested in it. You’re leaving in a couple months, and my life is here, and you have big author dreams that I want so badly for you, and it’s all so complicated, and I’ve been a real dick to you, and?—”
Maisie’s lips cut off my rambling, and I melt into her. She knows exactly how to ease all my anxiety with one gesture. She answers all my questions with a fiery, passionate kiss that has my dick rising to attention under her. She’s fully straddling me now, grinding down on me while letting out little mewls into my mouth. I eat up every single one.
I don’t care that my ribs are screaming at me in protest, or that she makes the cuts on my face crack. All I care about are her lips on mine and the sweet taste of her on my tongue. My hands find her waist, sliding down to her bare cheeks, my shirt now sitting high on her hips.
“Fuck, you drive me crazy, woman,” I groan into her mouth, palming her cheeks.
Maisie pulls away, smirking down at me, and I want to kiss it right off her face. “There, is that answer enough for you, cowboy? I’m not going anywhere for now, so you’re stuck with me. Never again will you make a decision forme. Got it?”
I sigh, trailing my pointer fingers along the edge of her lace panties. “Maisie?—”
“No! No. No more, Grayson. I’m a grown woman, and I get to make decisions about my life. You can’t shut me out anymore. What I walked in on last night…I never want to see you hurting like that ever again. You hear me? You aren’t alone in this anymore. You have me now. Promise you won’t push me away again or keep more secrets from me.”
I can’t make that promise, not if her life is on the line. If I have to choose between her staying alive and lying, I’ll choose her life every time. She doesn’t need to know that, though. Maybe she already knows it but wants me to feed her pretty lies.
The words come out easily. “I promise,” I whisper against her lips, letting it burn all the way to her, and then I crash my lips to hers, hoping the kiss can chase away the lie so it doesn’t sting as bad.
Our lips are pressed together all of two seconds before a hellion yowls from the doorway.
I jolt up, taking a gasping Maisie with me. “What the fuck was that?”
Maisie tries to conceal a laugh behind her hand, finding this very funny. “It’s breakfast time.”
A little furry hairball saunters into my room, leaving a trail of frizzy hair flying through the air. It stops to scratch its claws on my rug before hopping right up on the bed like it owns the place.
“Hi, sweet girl,” Maisie praises, giving her a chin rub. The fluff ball eats up Maisie’s words, and I imagine that’s what I look like when she gives me attention too.
