“Ivan, I’m tired. I’m beat down, and I’m three days beyond exhausted. Carrying this family has damn near broken me. While you don’t want me to ask for you to let me walk away, I have to ask you not to make me stay. I don’t think I can do it anymore. I’m tired of walking through the blood and bowels. I’m tired of feeling cursed and not knowing what I did to have to carry this burden.”
He stared into her eyes in the dark car. He could see her face from the lights of the cabin.
And he knew.
In that moment, Ivan saw the truth.
“You’re at rock bottom, aren’t you?”
Slowly, she nodded.
“I don’t know who I am anymore. I used to be Elizabeth LaRue, once upon a time. She was damn good at what she did, but she sold her soul, and the price was heavy.”
He was quick to point something out.
“You are still her.”
Honestly, she liked to believe that.
Deep down, Elizabeth hoped that he was right, but it was going to take time.
And trust.
What she would ask of them would be monumental, but for once in the fifteen years that she’d been married and carried the Blackhawk clan on her back, she’d never asked for anything.
That was coming to an end.
“I need to find her again. So, I’m putting my faith in you, as my friend. Please let me have space to find her. Next to Duke, you’re my brother. I share everything with you because you’re also part of my safe space. I trust you with my life, and you matter to me as if Charlie himself birthed you from his loins.”
He let her talk.
“Ivan, I really feel that to the depths of my heart. We’ve walked through shit, and we came out the other side. I need you to have faith in me and give me the grace I believe I deserve to find Elizabeth LaRue again. She’s out there somewhere, and she’s lost.”
Her words touched him because he felt the same. Ivan didn’t have siblings, but he did have her. She was his sister from another mister, and he’d do anything he could for her.
Including this.
Gently, he touched her face.
“Kiddo, I do. I’d stand ten toes down with you in a trench surrounded by insurgents or serial killers. You have my loyalty, my trust, and my faith. Always.”
That helped.
Elizabeth would always do the work to get to the goal, but she needed the men in her life to give her that grace.
She’d earned it.
“Then, let me find that faith in myself again, so I can come back and be the woman everyone needs.”
He held up his hand.
“Pinkie swear it’s not goodbye forever.”
She didn’t hesitate. Instead, she held up her finger, and locked it to his.
“I swear.”
Then, he had to give her what she wanted.
