Again.
“Hayes?” I look down between us, and he rolls so we’re on our sides, but he’s still inside me.
“Hmm?” His eyebrows pinch, filling with worry. “Did I hurt you?”
“No, not at all. I just realized that we—or more like we didn’t—”
“I know.” He rests his forehead against mine, bringing us nose-to-nose.
“We didn’t use a condom,” I clarify anyway.
“I’m not fucking my wife with anything between us.”
“But I’m not on birth control anymore.” I bite my lower lip, pulling his attention.
His thumb moves to my mouth, tugging my lip free. He’s quiet for a moment, but there’s no worry in his eyes. Nothing to hint that he’s concerned about what we’ve just done.
“Do you want to be on birth control?” he asks finally.
The answer should probably be yes, especially after today. The last thing we need is another child my uncle can use against us. Another person who can be hurt in this war raging between our families.
But as I look up into Hayes’s eyes, I can’t deny the truth. I want everything with this man. More children. A future.
What if his club wins?
What if we could have this?
I cling to that hope in the darkness like it’s the last quarter in my pocket. It’s better to bet on something than to never take a risk.
I wrap my arms around his shoulders, holding him close. “No, I don’t want to be on birth control.”
“Good.” His smile steals my breath. “I don’t want that either.”
This time, when he kisses me, there is no pause. No question. No waiting. We’re gambling with both our lives, but some risks are worth taking.
25
Soul
The guys have beenitching for a party. Between the Feds storming the compound and the constant threat of other clubs scoping out abandoned Iron Sinners territory, everyone has been desperate for a night off. On top of that, I’ve been looking for an excuse to show Emery a little fun.
She does everything for our daughter while I’m tied up with the club. Sacrificing sleep, time, energy. Emery cares for Charlie with her entire being, and it’s one of many reasons I’m falling hard and fast for her. But I don’t want her to forget who she is outside of being a mother.
Emery is a fireball. She’s a wild spirit. She deserves to explore that side of herself too.
So tonight, I’m setting her free of her responsibilities, thanks to Steel’s grandma, Pearl, who offered to babysit Charlie while she’s watching Ember and Austin. We’repartying at the clubhouse, and with her by my side, I’m excited about it for the first time in ten months.
I help Emery out of the truck, and she gives me the biggest, brightest smile. Her hand grips mine as she hops out, and her tits do a perfect little bounce. This girl is going to be the death of me. Her itty-bitty coral dress barely covers her ass—which is the whole reason I drove the truck instead of putting her on the back of my bike. It’s molded to her body, making it impossible to keep my hands off her.
Thankfully, she curls to my side, fitting perfectly in that spot beneath my arm where I want her. There’s nothing like the feel of her fingers resting on my stomach. Like the sight of her big blue eyes blinking up at the clubhouse with excitement.
I’ve been to a thousand parties here, but with Emery at my side, it feels different from the rest. I’m not walking in intending to chase a high for the night. I’m here to show this girl the world.
Emery is so responsible it’s easy to forget she’s only twenty-two. Her first drink was at the casino the night we met. That night was filled with firsts for her. There’s still so much she’s yet to see—to do.
I’ll make sure she gets it all.
I want to help her explore.
