“I don’t know!” he yells, throwing his arms out. “I’m lonely, Seth. I hate this fucking pandemic, and I hate being afraid of people. And I’m getting really fucking tired of my own hand,” he says with a small snort. “But that’s not on you, dude. So, let’s just drop it and we can pretend I never even came tonight. I’ll go home and drown myself, or something.”
He crosses his arms, leaning back against the counter, crossing an ankle over the other.
I snort. Then I chuckle, which turns into a laugh. This is the most absurd thing I’ve ever heard. I’m serious. What the actual fuck?
“Fuck off!” he says, shaking his head.
“I’m sorry,” I say, in between fits. “I’m sorry.”
I take a deep breath, dragging my hands down my face.
I know I’ll come to regret this. I know it, but when has something like that ever stopped me?
I mean, for fuck’s sake, he’s handing himself over to me on a fucking silver platter, am I supposed to say no?
Probably.
But I don’t.
This is strike one.
“Fuck it!” I say. “Let’s do it.”
“What?” He looks up at me, eyes wide.
“Let’s do it. It’s like you said, we’ve already done it, so what’s the harm, right?”
He just stares at me. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah. I mean, I had a test drive, and it wasn’t that bad,” I say, shrugging. Like I don’t really give a fuck and like I haven’t thought about our two encounters every night for weeks.Ha! Oh, god.
He snorts. “Not that bad? That’s all I get?”
“I’m not stroking your ego, you know how much I liked it. You on the other hand,” I say, tilting my head back and forth. “Doubtful.”
“Doubtful?” He huffs a laugh. “Are you high or something? Dude, I almost passed out. Both times,” he adds. The words are music to my ears.
“Well,” I say with a shrug and a smug smile on my lips. “I aim to please. Consider this your warning,” I add, pointing a finger at him.
He chuckles, shaking his head. “Fuck! Can’t believe we’re having this conversation. What the fuck?”
I snort.
He takes a breath. “Okay, straight up? You’re my best friend, but I’m not taking that for granted. This can’t come between us. I need us to still be us, in the end. Okay?”
“Deal.”
“That means brutal honesty between you and me,” he says, waving a hand between us. “If anyone wants out, it’s off, no hard feelings, and you and I stay the same. Okay?”
“Okay,” I nod.
“I mean it, Seth,” he says, searching my eyes. “Any reason we should stop, and you tell me.”
“Yeah. Promise.”
“Okay.” He bites his cheek, holding back a smile.
“So,” I say, throwing my arms out. “Should we seal this deal with a kiss? Or a blowie? May I offer you some freshly showered dick, perhaps?” I say, wiggling my hips at him.
