“Such intimacies require complete trust, Iris,” Camelia replied carefully; her tone was gentle but serious. “The kind of trust that comes from knowing someone will protect your heart as fiercely as your body. What better person to place that trust in than one’s own husband? The man bound to you by vows, by honor, by the eyes of society. Anything less feels… perilous. Dangerous, even.”
Iris’s heart sank. That was not quite the answer she had been hoping for. She had wanted reassurance, perhaps even permission, for the reckless bargain she had struck with the Duke of Knoxford. That way, she could justify the fire he had lit within her.
“Why do you ask?” Camelia squeezed her arm affectionately as they continued walking along the curving path beside the water.
“Just… out of curiosity.”
“Hmm.” Camelia was not buying it. “That said… If you feel you can truly trust someone enough to respect your boundaries and not ruin you or cast you aside afterward, then you owe no explanation to anyone, not to society, not to our family, and not even to me. After all these years of solitude and sacrifice, Iris, you deserve to let yourself go. To feel alive and to experience pleasure without the constant chains of duty weighing you down.”
Iris looked down at the gravel path, her throat tightening with emotion. The words stirred a longing she had buried for seven long years.
“I have not sacrificed anything,” she insisted quietly, though her voice wavered. “When it truly mattered, I could not help our family. I could not save Papa from ruin or prevent you from having to marry for our sake. I still feel so humiliated by my uselessness. By how powerless I was.”
Camelia stopped walking entirely and turned to face her fully, a soft, knowing laugh escaping her lips. She reached out and brushed a stray curl from Iris’s face with sisterly tenderness.
“Oh, Iris. I am beginning to think you take a strange satisfaction in reminding yourself of that one single failing. When the rest of your life has been that of a perfect, spotless angel.”
Iris frowned at her. “What is that supposed to mean?”
Camelia sighed and continued, “You carried us through Mama’s death with such quiet strength. You managed the household when Papa fell apart. You endured a cold, empty marriage and seven years of crushing debt without a single complaint. You bargained with creditors, mended sheets until your fingers bled, and kept that crumbling house standing through sheer force of will. Yet you cling to thatonemoment of helplessness as if it defines your entire worth.”
Iris blinked back the sudden sting of tears, and her chest began to ache. “It feels like I failed when it mattered most.”
Her sister pulled her into a warm embrace.
“You did not fail,” she whispered fiercely against Iris’s hair. “And you are allowed to want more than penance, sister. You are allowed to desire. So be selfish for once. Let a man, even a dangerous, scarred duke, make you feel like a woman instead of a martyr.”
Iris pulled back. “How did you?—”
“I am not blind, Iris.” Camelia winked at her wickedly, and she felt her face heat up with embarrassment.
They resumed walking after a moment; the emotional weight of the conversation lingered like a heavy perfume in the air. Iris gathered her scattered thoughts, her heart pounding as she voiced the question that had been burning inside her for days.
“Camelia… what really happened the night you met your husband? And tell me the truth, please. I do not need a pretty version for my sake.”
Camelia’s steps faltered briefly. She glanced around to ensure they had a measure of privacy before speaking in a low, honest voice.
“The night I met Raph… I had been prepared to sell my body,” she admitted quietly, her cheeks colored slightly at the memory, and Iris’s heart shattered. She briefly remembered her promise to Blaise.
“I was going to sell myself to the first man who would have paid enough to save our family from immediate ruin,” Camelia continued.
“Camelia, why did you not tell me?” Iris choked on her words, and fresh tears sprang into her eyes.
“I was desperate, Iris. I saw no other path. I walked into that situation ready to sacrifice my innocence and my dignity.”
“How could I have not seen this and save you from your decision?” She shook her head and felt the hot tears fall carelessly across her cheek.
“But Raph saved me. He refused to take advantage of my situation. He would not rest until he brought me home safely. He protected me when I was ready to throw myself away forall of you. That is the main reason I was able to trust him so completely, even when we were both too foolish and stubborn to admit our growing feelings. And I trusted him intimately too…”
Iris looked at her sister with a mixture of understanding and concern.
“But what if you did not meet Raph? I would not have been able to live with myself?—”
“But I did meet him, and it all worked out.” Camelia reached out and squeezed her hand reassuringly. “That night, Raph showed me the kind of man he truly was beneath the title and the charm. If you had stopped me, I would have never met him.” She smiled, and Iris felt a warmth spread across her chest.
Iris absorbed Camelia’s words, turning them over slowly in her mind. She thought of Blaise, the way he paid off her debts, and the fierce protectiveness he showed toward Marcus.
“I think I understand,” she finally whispered, and a quiet resolve began forming.
