My parents quickly glance at each other, and their stunned silence tells me everything I need to know. If it were true, they would laugh immediately and call me a silly goose for even thinking such a thing.
But they don’t.
Which means Sullivan still gets first prize for not telling a lie.
I whirl around, almost landing in Sullivan’s arms again with how closely he stands behind me. But I sidestep him and run outside, barely hearing him tell them he’ll handle it. Straight to my favorite tree I go, a thick oak with a tangle of low hanging branches, and clamber up to hide as my world crumbles around me. How could they keep something as important as this from me? All three of them. For years!
“Move over.”
Biting my lip to stop the sob that wants to hiccup out, I peer down and find Sullivan looking up at me. All the hurt from before attacks me all over again, and I glare through blurry eyes. “No.”
His head tilts back while he mutters something under his breath, and it makes me mad when I can’t hear what he says. It’s not like he’s the one who found out he’d just been betrayed by all the ones he’d held dear. Right as I draw in a breath big enough for some scathing, choice words, he crosses his arms and pins me with his piercing gaze. “I’m coming up. It’s up to you whether I sit on top of you or whether you scoot over six inches so I can sit beside you.”
Ugh.
I’ve lived with him long enough to know he’ll make good on his threat, so I begrudgingly move to make room for him. When his dark blond hair pops into view again, my mouth dries and my heart triples its beating for some weird reason.
“Hey,” he says with a softness that brings all my tears so close to the surface. It hurts to look at him as he straddles the branch and settles beside me, so I don’t.
And I don’t say anything, either. If he wants to bully his way up here, there’s no law that says I have to talk to him when he does. Childish, I know. But he completely upturned my world with only a few words.
“This doesn’t have to change things, Emma. I’m still me. I’m still the one who’s been here for you since you were a little baby.”
I clench my teeth at the pain in his voice. How dare he act hurt when he basically told me he’s never been my brother? Part of me still doesn’t believe it. But there’s only one way to find out.
It would be disgusting to kiss a brother, so that’s exactly what I’m going to do.
“Whoa…don’t fall.” He steadies me as I swing one leg over the branch to face him, but he never sees my next move coming.
Neither do I, really, because I don’t have a plan. All I know is I have to prove to both of us that he’s my brother. Whatever we both felt earlier wasn’t real. It can’t be. I grab a fistful of his shirt, yank him forward, and pinch my eyes closed as I awkwardly press my mouth to his.
And then I wait.
Any second now, vomit will creep up my throat and I’ll spew it onto his shirt because this is my brother and brothers are gross.
Any second now.
Really…any second.
But it never does.
And he doesn’t shove me away.
Instead, he leans in, parting his lips just the scantest bit. I sever the contact, suddenly feeling very miserable and out of sorts. Nothing is as it should be. “Why doesn’t it feel wrong?” I brokenly whisper. “It should, but it doesn’t.”
And now I’m the one feeling unnerved by his eyes, but not because of the coloring. There’s something swirling around in the depths of their dark centers. Something that makes my stomach flutter and my fingers turn both hot andcold. Something that makes me feel both trapped and like I want to dive headlong into it.
“Because it’s not wrong.” Sullivan’s voice is lower, huskier as his hands come to rest on the tree behind me. “I never wanted to feel this way about you, but damn it if having you beneath me didn’t make me realize just how much I was fighting myself not to lay all the way down on you and do this.”
Then his lips are on mine again, but his kiss isn’t awkward at all. It’s slow but insistent. He chases my mouth and steals my breaths as I fight to keep some hold on my sanity. I’ve never had any strong drink, but surely this must be what it feels like…this unbelievable pleasure that burns and overwhelms all the senses.
“Open your mouth,” Sullivan murmurs, nudging my lips with his. I don’t know why, but I obey, and suddenly I’m overtaken by the heat and silky softness. His hands don’t feel like this, not with the calluses on the fingertips. He groans, the sound so low and deep that my nipples tighten. This is too much. He’s too much.
“I can’t breathe.” I whimper the words into his mouth as my vision turns spotty. I truly can’t. He’s always only been Sully, my brother, but right now he’s Sullivan. A man with shoulders that feel so broad and strong under my hands. A man who cages me with his arms to keep me right where he wants me as he pulls all sorts of unfamiliar reactions from my body.
I don’t know this man, and I think I’m scared to learn him.
“Yes, you can.” Sullivan’s mouth leaves, but his forehead rests on mine. “With me now. Deep breath, then release.”
