I ignore my locker, which is right next to Aisling’s and Dee’s—and head right toward Ishu’s. I find her with her locker door open, staring inside with a faraway look in her eyes.
She must be more nervous about the Head Girl presentations than I expected.
“Ishu?” I tap her on the shoulder.
She turns around and her gaze immediately shifts into a glare. I try to ignore the pain in my chest at Ishu looking at me like this.
“What the fuck are you doing?” She steps away from me, like my tap on her shoulder was too much for her to bear.
“I just … wanted to wish you luck on the Head Girl presentations,” I offer. “And …” I pull out the box of red-velvet cupcakes Amma helped me make yesterday. “I made these cupcakes, see?” I open up the box so Ishu can see, with their multi-colored icing spelling outVOTE ISHITA #1in bright pink writing. I figured the best way to win people over was with sugar—everybody’s weakness. “So that I can help you get people to—”
“I don’t want your help,” Ishu says. She slams her locker door shut, like it’s somehow personally wronged her. “I don’tneedyour help.”
“Ishu, I’m just—”
“Ishita,” she says. “And leave me alone.” She pushes past me and disappears into the crowd of girls from our year. I feel my stomach sink. I’ve been relegated to calling her Ishita, like someone who doesn’t know her, hasn’t spent time with her, hasn’t held her hand or thought about her until the late hours of night with butterflies in my stomach.
Like we’re nothing at all to each other.
When the bell rings at eight thirty, everyone but the fifth years shuffle off into their respective classes. I follow the rest of the girls in my year into the main hall, where everything has been set up for the Head Girl candidates to give their presentations.
There are rows of chairs filling up the space, and a stage set up at the very front. There’s even a little podium with a mic, and a projector toward the back facing the screen set up on stage. Somehow, this feels even more official than all of the election events I’ve been to with Abba.
The rows of chairs fill up fast, and I spot Aisling and Dee sitting toward the front. They’re both sitting slumped in their seats, looking like this is the last place on earth they want to be. And they’re whispering to each other. My stomach drops at the sight of them, and I look away quickly.
I decide to choose a seat at the very back of the hall—as far away from Aisling and Dee as humanly possible. But I’m definitely not going to spend this time feeling bad about what happened with them yesterday. Just because Ishu hates me now doesn’t mean I shouldn’t help her the best I can.
I promised to help her become Head Girl, and that’s what I’m going to do.
So, I pull out the box of cupcakes from my bag and turn to the group of girls sitting next to me: Hannah, Yasmin, and Sinéad.
“Hey,” I say in the brightest voice I can muster. “Are you planning on voting for Ishita?” I hold out the cupcakes so they can see that they’re for Ishu’s supporters.
The three of them share a look with each other, before Sinéad turns to me with a frown. “Um … hasn’t Ishita been cheating in school? I’m not sure any of us should be voting for someone like that.”
I don’t let my smile falter—though it’s difficult to keep smiling. “If Ishu really has been cheating, would she be let back into the Head Girl election?”
Hannah shrugs. “Well, if she’s capable of cheating, then who knows what else she’s capable of doing? I mean … she’s always been ambitious.” She says the last word as if ambitious is the worst thing anybody could hope to be.
“Ishita didn’t cheat,” I say with the most definitive voice I can—while still sounding pleasant. “Everything got cleared up. It was … it was …” I cast a glance at Aisling at the very front. She has her arms crossed over her chest, and she’s glaring at Ishu up on stage. “Aisling was the one who cheated.”
Hannah blinks at me slowly. They all do. Like the thought ofAislingbeing the one who cheated isn’t possible. Though I’m pretty sure Aisling was the one who told them all about Ishu.
“You should vote for Ishita,” I say, thrusting the box of cupcakes in front of them once more before they can say anything else. “She’s the best person for this job, trust me.”
None of them look fully convinced, but they do each grab a cupcake from the box.
I manage to give out only a few more cupcakes—and tell a few more people that it wasn’tIshuwho cheated—before Principal Gallagher strolls up to the stage. I shuffle back into my seat as she casts a sweeping glance over the stage, a smile flickering on her lips.
“Welcome, fifth years,” she says into the mic. “This year you have the opportunity to make a very important decision in this school. You get to choose which student amongst these four will represent you, and the entire school, as our Head Girl next year.Andyou can decide who will serve as deputy Head Girl. Two positions that are of immense importance in our school.” She holds our gaze for a long, tense moment. She’s acting as if we’re choosing the next president of Ireland, not just the two people who will spend most of next year organizing school photos and planning our debs.
“So, this is your opportunity to listen to what each of these students has to offer and make an informed decision.” Ms. Gallagher glances at the four girls sitting at the back of the stage. Alex, Siobhán, and Maya smile down at the rest of us. But Ishu—sitting at the very edge, looks lost to this world. Her eyebrows are furrowed together and she’s deep in thought. My stomach twists at the sight of her.
“We’ll start with Alexandra Tuttle.” The room erupts into applause and Ms. Gallagher takes her seat on the other side of the stage.
All of us listen attentively as Alex tells us about her experience in leadership, and how she’s been at this school since first year, and wants us to graduate next year in the best way possible. Next, Siobhán says almost all of the same things as Alex but smiles a lot more. Maya spends way too much time talking about the debs, and how she’s been dreaming of her own ever since she saw her older sister’s debs dress a few years ago, so she will spend her time organizing the best dance she can possibly put together. She even has a PowerPoint presentation with some ideas of what our debs might look like. When she walks away from the mic, there are whoops and cheers.
Obviously, leadership skills and love of the school are not what the girls in our year are looking for in a Head Girl.
