‘I’m not done, actually.’
‘Are you serious?’ I know Dina can be childish – but this is going a bit overboard.
‘There are other bathrooms in this place. Go find one of those.’ With that, Dina makes to close the bathroom door on me, but I step forward, pushing my way past her, so that the door shuts behind the both of us.
Dina shoots me another glare. ‘Fine. Whatever. I’ll go and find another bathroom then,’ she huffs.
She twists the handle, but the door doesn’t open. Dina’s expression quickly shifts from anger to one of panic. She pulls at the door, desperation clear in her face.
‘Don’t tell me that—’
‘It’s stuck.’
Dina turns to me with another glare, like this is somehow my fault. ‘It was fine before. I locked it behind me and I opened it no problem.’
‘I didn’t even touch the door.’ I hold up my hands defensively, not that that makes Dina back up in any way. ‘Here, let me try.’
I move past Dina, trying my best not to touch her, though this whole bathroom is filled with the familiar earthy scent of her and it’s a little overwhelming. Twisting the doorknob, I pull, but it doesn’t budge in the slightest. I try knocking on the door and calling out. ‘Hello? Is anybody out there?’ But all I hear is the ongoing muffle of noises drifting up from the party downstairs. ‘Shit …’
‘They’re not going to hear us, unless they come upstairs,’Dina says. She already sounds like she’s given up, which is so typical of her that it makes a prickle of anger run through me. Dina has always been quick to give up. On everything, big or small.
I try banging on the door, louder now. But there’s still no response.
I slip out my phone and try to call Amma, then Abba, but there’s no response from either of them. By the time I turn back to Dina, she’s sitting with the toilet seat down, studying me with a grim expression.
‘If you hadn’t tried to barge in here, this wouldn’t have happened,’ she says.
‘Why don’t you try calling someone?’ I ask.
‘I did. I texted Deen, but he hasn’t replied. He probably doesn’t even have his phone on him, I don’t know.’
‘Well, it’s not my fault. You were being ridiculous.’
Dina stands up suddenly and starts walking towards me. I feel my face flush as she advances, unsure of what exactly she’s doing.
‘If you have to use the bathroom, I’ll turn away,’ she says, stopping just a few paces ahead of me.
My face heats up even more at that idea. I shake my head quickly. ‘I don’t actually have to use the bathroom,’ I admit. ‘I just …’ I pause, unsure of what I should even say … ‘needed a moment to myself.’
Dina frowns. ‘Oh.’ She pauses for a beat and adds, ‘Why?’
‘I don’t know. Just a little overwhelming, being here, seeing everyone.’ I shrug. I definitely don’t want to get into it with Dina. I’m not sure I want to get into it with anyone. I came up here to try to get away from all my spiralling thoughts and anxieties, not to ruminate on them further.
‘I would have thought you’d be loving all the attention.The prodigal daughter returns,’ Dina says, her voice bitter.
I wonder if that’s what Dina really thinks of me – that I’m someone who is obsessed with attention, who loves to live in the limelight. I shouldn’t be surprised. Back in school, she thought that I was a teacher’s pet who would do anything to have the attention of the teachers over her. There were years of bitterness between us before she admitted that was why she hated me so much – she saw me as someone who had everything but still wanted more. It was getting to know each other that had shattered those illusions about me, and I guess she’d had to shatter some of the illusions I had about her too.
It had felt brave back then, opening myself up to Dina. Sharing things with her I’d never shared with anybody else. And she’d seen me, understood me. Or at least I thought that she had.
Because when things had gone wrong – when Dina didn’t get what she wanted – she turned on me so easily, it felt like she just flicked a switch. Then, opening myself up in the way I had felt foolish: like I had offered my heart to Dina on a platter, ready for her to break it into a million pieces.
‘I don’t,’ I reply simply. I turn away from her and go for the door once again. It rattles stubbornly against the doorframe. But it doesn’t give even an inch, and I sigh, collapsing against it.
‘Are you going to Zul’s wedding next month?’ Dina asks suddenly. ‘I’m guessing she’s invited you, now that you’re back.’
‘I don’t know, I haven’t decided.’
Dina sighs. ‘Well, let me know. If you go, then I can’t.’
